New Adventures of Sakon!!11

[Terracosmo]

Amazing cover art by Barb! <3

Since I am bored beyond belief (and currently under the influence of no sleep) I have written a short story about the tragic past of Sakon, who is clearly the best character ever

First off, a list of the appearing characters. (more like icon explanation because I had to make 'em pretty small)

- Sakon, our brave hero.
- This is just Sakon with a "wtf" expression.
- Ukon, Sakon's brother.
- Sakon Senior, Sakon's father. (notice the awesome moustasche)

-Our story begins a dark morning during .. ehh.. yeah, some time ago. A child is born!-

- Oh how I have longed for this moment, to embrace the moment of fathership, to finally see my clan move towards a bright future! Oh my son, come into my arms! .... what the fuck, he has lipstick!!!!
A nurse: This is most remarkable. A male child born with lipstick on!
- THIS IS NOT A MALE CHILD
A nurse: I'm sorry, but it is.
- "¤)="(!()!)"

-Sakon Senior was shocked to discover that his child was androgynous. But he took it like a man!-

- I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL KILL MYSELF TODAY

-The day came when the young child was supposed to get a name-

A priest: So what are you going to name your child?
- Sakon.
A priest: Oh, that's an original name.
- Yeah, it's short for Sophia Amber Kennedy Orgasmo Nora
A priest: Wow. That's a lot of female names. I thought this was a male chi...
- SHUT UP

*Fast forward 15 years*

- Shit. My life sucks. Everybody thinks I'm female, and I have a head growing on my back for some reason.
- Hey you little homo, remove that head from your back.
- But I... can't...
- REMOVE IT
- God, life sucks. I need to get a blog, on the internet. So I can talk about all my problems.

- Dear blog. Today my father called me a homo. It actually made me happy, because usually he calls me "flaming" homo. He tends to be gentle when he wins money on his illegal gambling services however.
- (From downstairs) RUN FASTER YOU GODDAMN NINJA DOG, ARGHHHH I PUT ALL OF MY FAIRY DAUGHTER'S SCHOOL MONEY ON THIS CRAP AND YOU CAN'T EVEN WIN
- Dear blog, suicide gets closer every day. I think I need to take a walk, to relieve myself of all this unavoidable pain.

Sakon takes a walk.

- Life sucks. I need to find an androgynous role model that I can follow. Where to find one.

Sakon finds a note on the ground.

- A NOTE! It reads...

"Orochimaru's playground for happy freaks! Do YOU have 4 arms too many? Do YOU suffer from unbearable pain in your back? Are you on the verge of dying? Do you have a bloodline limit? DO YOU HAVE A HEAD ON YOUR BACK FOR NO REASON? We have just the place for you!"

- Sounds great.
- I thirst for chaos.
- ??? Must be my imagination
- IT IS NOT YOUR IMAGINATION! It is I, Ukon! The better half of us.
- Yeah. Right. And I'm the mushroom master, the better half of my breakfast.
- Eh, what?
- Nothing, nothing.
- I AM YOUR FREAKIN' BROTHER! THE HEAD ON YOUR BACK!
- Really?
- Yes
- ...
- ...
- ...
- ...
- What the fuck did our mother look like?
- You don't want to know. Let's go visit this Orochimaru fellow now, so he can curse us and make us his loyal subjects, which will eventually be used to guard some random gayfag from leaf village who wants to meet him in order to kill his brother.
- Sounds great. Does this Orochimaru fellow give us cookies?
- He's a pedophile with white make-up, what do you think?
- ...for cookies, I will gladly die.
- YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE YOU LITTLE FAIRY
- TARENKEN!!!
- *dies*

IN THE NEXT ISSUE OF NEW ADVENTURES OF SAKON: SAKON MEETS TAYUYA
YOU CAN NOT AFFORD TO MISS THIS

- COOKIES!!!

[Mut]

and............. the average intelligence level of gw drops by 40%.

[Terracosmo]

You're just jealous of Sakon's unfathomable coolness.

[Turkish-S]

whow this is just ownage.
but i really believe that u are borred. damn wat a story[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-shocked.gif[/img]

[PSJ]

yea this was uhm diffrent. but quite funny keep em coming.

[Omri]

Terracosmo, it is pretty funney, and yes, you are bored.
I'm waiting to the next one to come out.

But can you tell me how the father died, I didn't understand that.

[Terracosmo]

He did the tarenken (mach punch) move on him.

[Omri]

Ow, right the Tarenken, what a cruel move...to kill you're father.

Nasty fairy...

[basey44]

ah so thats the origin of sakon, looks like i wont even have to wait for kishimoto to make a flashback of his life, its all right here. also i believe you got oros character down perfectly

[Terracosmo]

Exclusive preview of episode 2:

- Argh! It's satan!!!
- For the 51351285th time, I AM YOUR BROTHER YOU STUPID SON OF A BITCH

[Omri]

Terracosmom, i's like watching a comedy about sitcoms (I mean in the good way).
[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif[/img]

[Musashi]

lol, nice history about Sakon's childhood [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif[/img]

[anime050]

Terra, you have way too much time on your hands o-O even if you are bored. =P.

Was quite entertaining though XDD.

[NM]

Lmao Terra. Looking forward to the next episode [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif[/img].

[Assassin]

damn terra, u seriously need some booze

[Knives122]

Originally posted by: anime050
Terra, you have way too much time on your hands o-O even if you are bored. =P.

Was quite entertaining though XDD.

yeah you really do terra, but the only thing I can think of now is WOW1111one!

[GLS]

ROTFL
Looking forward to Tayuya in the next episode.

[ShinobiNeko]

lol Terra, seems you really were bored, but interesting adventure you came up with [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif[/img]

[Warmaster]

And out of boredom comes sheer nutcase genius!!! Man This was good!
Just a question: were you stoned when you wrote that or just drunk??? In either case, tell me what u're usin', I need to get some of that!!!!

[PSJ]

sorry to tell you that terra is like that when he's sober, you dont want to run into him when hes drunk [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif[/img]