Results 1 to 9 of 9

Thread: how to get out of a speeding ticket

  1. #1

    how to get out of a speeding ticket

    A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

    Officer: May I see your driver's license?

    Driver: I don't have one. It was revoked when I got my 5th DWI.

    Officer: May I see the registration for this vehicle?

    Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.

    Officer: The car is stolen?

    Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the registration in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

    Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?

    Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

    Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?

    Driver: Yes, sir.

    Hearing this, the officer immediately called his Captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the Captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

    Captain: Sir, can I see your license?

    Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid.

    Captain: Whose car is this?

    Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the registration. The driver owned the car.

    Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?

    Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it. Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

    Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.

    Driver: No problem. Trunk is opened; no body.

    Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.

    Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I was speeding, too!

  2. #2
    Junior Sexfiend PSJ's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    At a bar
    Age
    35
    Posts
    5,104

    RE: how to get out of a speeding ticket

    lol that was one of the funniest jokes i've heard in a while.

  3. #3
    Missing Nin Lefty's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Bellevue, WA
    Age
    40
    Posts
    1,138

    how to get out of a speeding ticket

    LMAO. that's funny as hell. But I doubt it would work in real life, only with a really stupid officer.

  4. #4
    ANBU Arcn3ss's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Canada
    Age
    41
    Posts
    480

    how to get out of a speeding ticket

    Man..Thats an awesome joke. XD

    "Chrono is our Religion. In the name of the Chrono, the Zeal, the Trigger and Cross, Amen."

  5. #5

    how to get out of a speeding ticket

    Originally posted by: Lefty
    LMAO. that's funny as hell. But I doubt it would work in real life, only with a really stupid officer.
    unfortunately, we live in a society where people are, well, not all there. Stranger things can happen.
    *women have breasts. thats not fair to us guys who get tickets. what are we gonna do? have a ball hang out and stuff?*

    somewhat on/off the topic, if you ever get asked to do jury duty, and you want out of it, just ask where the white people drinking fountain is. Thats an instant pass outta there.

  6. #6
    Moderator Raven's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Melbourne, Australia
    Age
    42
    Posts
    2,836

    RE: how to get out of a speeding ticket

    Or, you could just say you're prejudiced against every race.

    Hahahaha @ joke btw.
    I think I know precisely what I mean
    when I say it's a schpadoinkle day

  7. #7
    Junior Sexfiend PSJ's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    At a bar
    Age
    35
    Posts
    5,104

    RE: how to get out of a speeding ticket

    LOL good one gaaralovessand.

  8. #8

    RE: how to get out of a speeding ticket

    lolz...nice joke...

  9. #9
    Hunter Nin Stoopider's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Melbourne Australia
    Posts
    1,649

    RE: how to get out of a speeding ticket

    Unlikely. They don't call their captains so easily. Have to be more than that in the boot.

    I've gotten out of lots of speeding tickets. Just bribe [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif[/img]. Thank God for corruption, and low police wages.
    MmmMmm. Ooiiishiii


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •