ok i got one! naruto is married to hinata but hinata realizes that hes cheating on her so she decides to murder him but gets killed by kakashis book that fell on her head. kakashi after finding out what happened desides to stick her in a closet. until on day kankuro decided to go out for a booty call,he got kakashi, and married iruka who was married to his coffie mug! gaara found out about hinata and went to go tell neji but ended up screwing him instead after that happened he went out with naruto and had a three some with baki. orochimaru found out and went into denial. kabuto decided to take advantage of oro's emotial state and took his virginity.but he did the same thing to zabuza when he thougt haku died but then turned into a pedifile and ended up marrying haku who works as an under age drag queen hooker! and shino became hokage but than ran away with ebisu, kakashi, and Jiraiya to go peek on naked girls in the sauna!! the end!