Hollywood's Terrible Ideas

[XanBcoo]

It's no secret that Hollywood seems to be running out of ideas for original movies nowadays. Almost every other movie that comes out seems to be either a sequel, a remake, or some Godawful Uwe Boll-inspired trash based on a game or book. I think for a while I was able to laugh all this off, since I probably wouldn't watch any of these anyway. But it was with the confirmation of the Alvin and the Chipmunks, and now Dragonball Z movies (neither of which are looking to appeal to any audience in particular) that I'm really left in disbelief. Some of this shit really is mind-boggling.

So what else do we have in store?

This is sort of old news by now, but still bears mentioning just because it's that fucking insane:
Jurassic Park 4 - Dinosaurs with Laser Beams

Also:
Terminator 4 - Because T3 wasn't nearly shitty enough

Shrek 4 (prequel)

Will Smith to direct Karate Kid remake - starring Jackie Chan as Mr. Miyagi

Johnny Quest live action movie

Remake of Hitchcock's The Birds

And the most bizarre news I've heard so far....I think we're long past the point of "Hollywood is running out of ideas" and are moving into a "Hollywood thinking up the craziest shit" era:
Joust movie announced - DOS games are apparently the next frontier


So yeah, I think individual threads for discussion of all these movies should be created (if anyone actually bothers watching them), but I think it'd be fun to keep track of news of and discuss/bash/ridicule some of these truly bizarre movie announcements. Which movies do you know will bomb, and should never have made it past a drunken suggestion, and what could possibly be next on the list?

[darkshadow]

dinosaurs and lazers? awesome, you prolly never played dino crisis 4 ( damn it rox)

[Genma]

Oh jesus...

The one I'm looking least forward to, however, is the remake of Karate Kid. Not only will it be weird having Jackie Chan as Mr Miyagi, but having Will Smith's son as the lead role? God, that kid has to be the most annoying kid on the face of this planet, and the only reason Will Smith doesn't realize it is because it's his son. I remember watching an interview with the both of them and thinking, "Damn, this kid better have aspergers, otherwise he's got NO EXCUSE for his behavior."

T4 with Vin Diesel. Oh, that's fresh... as if the Pacifier wasn't shitty enough.

Shrek 4, milkin' it for all its worth. I don't even think I've seen the second one, so oh well.

And as for the rest of them: greeeeat, a live action dino crisis, a DOS game movie, Johnny Quest... wtf... and The Birds, which they'll more-than-likely butcher.

[Psyke]

I hear a Robotech (Macross) movie is in talks, and will be starring our friendly neighbourhood web slinger. I'd love to see a transforming valkyrie on the big screen, but no singing please.

[masamuneehs]

the original "The Birds" is one of my least favorite Hitchock movies ever... it really helped set the way for 'evil animals attack for no real good reason and people run around screaming like retards trying to survive'... It has some good points too, but I thought it was a rather bad film... The remake is sure to suck...

Another thing about Hollywood: They seem to all get the same ideas for movies at the exact same time!

Last year it was:
Deja Vu, Next, and another movie all on the premise of short-term time travel or reading into the future.
Recently we have 'romantic comedies focusing on weird wives' - Heartbreak Kid and that Good Luck Chuck movie.
Couple this with the trend of remakes, sequels, prequels, and films about books and films about video games, and you've got nary an original idea per about a sample of a dozen movies...

I've just about given up on most films, to be honest. The last one I saw was a re-make (3:10 to Yuma), which I actually liked, even though Russel Crowe almost fucked everything up with mediocre acting... then again, I'm a western aficionado... I enjoyed Transformers, but it was pretty stupid and formulaic as well.

Any more stupid movie ideas floating out there?