Terra defeats your privacy part 302: The Relationship (& luv) Thread

[docdan63]

[QUOTE=masamuneehs]*reads that long ass conversation of which only 1/10th is pertinent to the discussion here*

Didn't I say to shoot the shit BEFORE bringing it up? That's why your conversation got derailed, cuz there was all the 'how's school doin?' crap still left to talk about.

In fishing one thing you do when your line is in the water is jiggle it around, reeling it in slowly to make the fish go after it. Basically that action is the 'shooting the shit', getting the formalities of
'hi Mr. Fish I'm a nice juicy worm'
'oh hello Mr. Worm, my you look good but may you be just a fisherman's trap?'
'Not at all my friend! Watch I move just like all live worms in water'
(fisherman jerks the rod -wow that sounds nasty- and makes the worm move)
'See! I'm perfectly healthy!'
'Well, you do look juicy so...'

And the second the fish bites on the hook you do not jiggle the worm around, you don't shoot the shit, you reel that sucker in to where you want it to be, squirming and flopping around like a virgin on a footballer player's prom night on the floor of your boat.

When you start to get to the point, GET THERE! Make sure there's no ways the conversation can deviate.





All good advice, thanks guys, and gal.

@masamuneehs: good tips man, thanks


I honestly don't know anymore. I'm thinking I have confidence issues that I need to get past first or soemthing. Everytime I go out with my buddy, when a nice looking girl shows up he turns into my wingman. For some reason I don't think that's ever going to go away. Until obviously I get one of those girls as my g/f. Another thing could be that where ever I went out where there were alot of really hot girls around, it becomes really hard to either choose only one to go after, or it just becomes hot girl overload and everything from my game to my sense of humor(best pick up trait) is thrown off, and I can't do a thing to stop it.

I don't think about it like a conquest. But I also don't think casually about it. Perhaps thats a problem as well.


Let me know what I should do or if you guys need more of my story, lol. I'll tell you guys anything you wanna know about my past or w/e

[Terracosmo]

I always find it funny with all these people who ask for tips, lines & strategies as if hooking up with women is some sort of strategy game or RPG. "You need to gain additional experience points in your conversation skill to enter this number 6 dungeon... uhh... female".

Just be yourself. And if that isn't enough, improve yourself!

Maybe easy for me to say, but I'm very happy about the fact that I've never had to read any "how to..." essays when it comes to these things.


Then again I am TERRA, GWAHHAHAHAAHA

*megalomaniac laugh*


Sorry, had too much whiskey tonight.

[Phoenix20578]

Well, I'm in a relationship of some type right now. I met her last year at work. So for a while we were just friends. Then a few months ago, we started hanging out a lot more. Like we started goin to clubs together, getting food, doin the random call shit, and all that good stuff. Then one day a few weeks ago, I asked her if she liked me and if we were goin out. She basically danced around the answer and just said she doesn't like going out with co-workers, which answered nothing. So for the past few weeks we've been the same as before. We've been hanging out, and I havent brought it up since last month. I really dont know what I should do at this point. I've really fallin for her, otherwise I never would've dealt with ant bs, but I am starting to get tired of this.

[docdan63]

wow, you know I heard inter work relationships are a no no. I almost tried that once with a girl, but it didn't work out so well, and she was 17, but I don't care for age much.


I guess it's the same as everything else, I just gotta practice and start meeting hot girls. Am I wrong thinking colleges are a good place to look?



btw
@Terra: that red head looks like she'd fuck you then call up demons to eat your soul when shes done. But if you think shes hot, what ever dude, eye of the beholder I guess.

[Death BOO Z]

I guess it's the same as everything else, I just gotta practice and start meeting hot girls. Am I wrong thinking colleges are a good place to look?

something like that, just that there isn't any 'level up' animation or EXP runs. when you hit on a girl (domestic abuse jokes not welcome) you aren't practising, you're starting a realtionship with her, for all that it counts.
yeah, that sounds old fashioned, but mostly you cant advance with her unless your partly serious about her.

[docdan63]

I don't think of it as Xp in a game or something. I just don't think walking up to a girl and starting to talk to her out of random is very nice. It's like you're invading her space. And also, what makes you better than the other guy cheking her out to go talk to her?

And I don't like relationships, they're too long and don't accomplish anything unless at the end you want to get married.

[iMUSTbeTHEdevil]

I don't think of it as Xp in a game or something. I just don't think walking up to a girl and starting to talk to her out of random is very nice. It's like you're invading her space. And also, what makes you better than the other guy cheking her out to go talk to her?

And I don't like relationships, they're too long and don't accomplish anything unless at the end you want to get married.

Hahahaha. Macomb Twp playa here. I bet the girls from Sterling Heights to Shelby Twp get wet when you walk by!

And on the "What makes you better than the other guy checking her out to go talk to her"
Well for one thing, you are.....TALKING TO HER! And creepishly staring at her from a distance. And no you dont have to be all up in her space, but you are close enough to speak without yelling at her. And about talking about talking about random things...that is the best way to start a conversation. Shit in MI all you have to do is talk about the weather. It changes everyday and it is an easy in. If she doesnt seem interested in your weather talk, try something else, and then if that doesnt work, walk away with your dignity!

But what do I know? Ya know?


-dg-

[el_boss]

Advice like "be yourself" doesn't help anyone. It makes no sense to tell this to a guy who has serious trouble with women. Would you tell a person who needs help with like building a house too just "try harder" or "figure it out". I don't get why it's so popular to not help guys who have problem with women.

If anyone reading this is serious about getting their shit together and put some real work into getting good with women you can PM mer add me on MSN, ashhas463@hotmail.com

I'm not saying that I'm a god at pick-up or anything, but I have basically built up my sexlife from 0 during the last year so I know what it's like.

Don't contact me if your going say bullshit like "you can't change" or "pick-up is wrong" or some shit like that. You are welcome to have shitty condititioning but don't bring it to me.

[iMUSTbeTHEdevil]

Being yourself isnt the way to go....not necessarily.

You just have to talk away the power of the Pussy. If pussy has no power over you then you dont have to worry about it. I mean come on, you can always masterbate. You dont have to put some much into getting with a girl and having sex. Just play it cool, and stop making pussy soo damned powerful!

-dg-

[TruthofMistake]

Woo, my turn to add to this thread. So... I spent a good 4-5 months pursuing a girl who was supposedly interested in me but, after less then a week of dating me, decided that she wanted to slow things down and not be a couple but just date... Ok I thought, that's fine, but said dates never seemed to happen. We would plan something out and she would claim to forget about it or bring other people along, namely her ex-boyfriend who she was still most definatly not over but claimed to want to be... So after said 4-5 months she decided she didn't want anything to do with me after all and went running back to the before mentioned ex-boyfriend. Whatever, I'm pretty much over that and have written off as experience, albeit a poor one.

So, into the present. I am currently pursuing a girl who is a good 2 years older then me and it appears to have a heavy influence in how she feels about me. I asked her out a while ago but she misunderstood it to be me asking to hang out with her more often which she agreed to. I'm pretty sure i'm in the infamous friend zone right now and would rather not be, as she is pretty attractive, and fun to hang out with. Right now I'm teaching her to play tennis and we hang out in person a day or so every week, and talk online most days. What should I do, try and advance things, or just stick with the way things are and hope for the best?

[docdan63]

well I say go for it man, My first lady was a year older than I was and it was fine.

[Yukimura]

Doesn't anyone have an uplifting story where they went for a girl who wasn't initially into them but they managed to win her over with perseverance and then proceded to have build a healthy stable relationship?

[docdan63]

dude, what?

That kind of situation shouldn't exist until you're like 27+(the relationship part, not winning her over). Anyone between 18-26 should just be having fun, and date around

IMO getting girls to like you instead is WAAY better than getting them over to your side.Much easier too

Plus, as far as I know, most people in thier 20's have too much fun stuff going on to worry about anything long term. Why would you bother with that anyway? You're only 20, 21, 22, etc once in your life.


Enjoy it I always say.

[Yukimura]

Well I meant getting a girl from neutral dismissal to her liking you enough for good things happen repeatably and both have fun. It wouldn't have to be happily ever after, since that'd get boring pretty fast. Most of good success stories in here are about Terra, who girls seem to simply throw themselves at. That's all well and good, but what about the less awesome folks?

[kenren]

I don't know if this story of mine can fit this thread. Please don't kill me >.<

so, when i was 15 , i confessed to this girl that i had been chatting with. We went to the same tuition classes. I was indirectly rejected. So i thought, "Forget it, a guy like me is better off being a beggar than a chooser" and time flows..But, funny thing is.. we were talking to each other more often after i was rejected. So when i was 16, i confessed again and yeah, i was accepted. So, time passed..we were very close at some point until last few months ago..she started to ignore me, i tried very hard to keep our bonds together as usual, but things don't seem to work out. Then, she told me that she wanted to be just friends, i broke down. I guess another guy came into her life. She left saying that my attitude sucks and she don't like it. But, why now? aren't we suppose to tolerate with each other? .. okay..nevermind that. That's all. Sorry for the bad english.

i guess this is what they called "puppy love"

[Death BOO Z]

she's a girl, she's obviously crazy. not much to do about it.
you just have to decide whether you like her enough to cling to her and take what she gives, or to move on and cut your ties with (to somewhat degree) and try to meet someone new.

besides, it doesn't really matter what you choose, you can just happen to meet someone cute without trying to.

[docdan63]

yeah man she's nuts. Rubix cube wrapped in a mystery wrapped in pms burrito.


And to every guy on this thread. You can alwys find someone better, cuter, smater and more fun.

They out number us in every part of the worl for gods-sake.

I know I'm going to get flamed for this, but I don't care.


My view is while in your 20's, a man shouldn't be a relationship longer than 4 months

[Assassin]

it mite be helpful if atleast one of the 4 girls that visit these forums were to contribute to this thread.

no offence to you all, but getting advice from a bunch of guys -- who spend thier free time playing games and watching anime no less -- is probably not the best way to solve our women problems

[TruthofMistake]

Heh, very true, but this would be one of the few places I can get objective advice. Every time I ask someone I know IRL for advice on the mattertheir opinions are skewed by like or dislike of the person involved, their current mood, etc. etc. =-\

[masamuneehs]

Truth, it's easy to fall into the same trap I did and endlessly pursue someone by being her friend. Sometimes good things come out of that, and I've heard the best long-term relationships can be friendships that turned into something more. But, depending on what you want and your situation, it's generally not good to just sit around and wait.

It seems like you're just a friend to her now, and so if you do make a move, make sure it'll leave you in a situation you can live with. Secretly loving your "friend" in vain can be just as bad or worse than making a move that fails and turning the friendship awkward or ruining it. You have to decide, but if you want her, make a stab at it. The best worst-case scenario is that you gain a friend.

kenren: sounds like you either didn't stay close enough with her (if you don't know if she has a new guy and she says "your attitude sucks", it sounds like you weren't spending that much time with her) or that it just wasn't meant to be. Don't let it get you down, especially because you could enjoy it for a little while. It's tough when you're young and someone lets you off as harshly as in your story. See my fish analogy.