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Thread: The Ask Terra Thread

  1. #81
    Sexfiend Terracosmo's Avatar
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    Stop fucking answering my questions and discussing random stuff in this thread!

    Answers will come soon. Will edit this post then.

    (currently watching X-Men Evolution. mwah hah.)

    EDIT: Said and done:

    --------------------

    Dear ...zellryo,

    "hamburger questions"

    BURGER KING > MCDONALDS
    I LOVE JUNK FOOD

    "If I do buy you the jar of cookies... can I get the first one?"

    lol

    "Can we kill Mexican Tv?"

    Mexican what? Do they have TVs there?

    (hi WD!)

    "Can we burn the people that censor Anime in the states?"

    Burn anime in the states altogether so we can stay cool and underground subjapanese!

    "random sounds"

    Yeah I also like to get drunk.

    "> The next phrase is true.
    > The previous one is false."

    Terra is true, everything else is not.

    "- Explain this other one.
    > There are 10 kinds of people. Those who know binary code, and those that don't."

    There are 2 kinds of people, the ones who laugh at this bad joke and those who don't.

    ---------------------

    Dear person who called me Dio's bitch, a name I liked,

    "In order to appease the fanboi within me, I must ask:

    What name would you bestow upon a dreamteam composed of: Guts, Kenshiro, Jotaro, and Alucard (Hellsing, not Castlevania)?
    These four are what I deem most hardcore (through action), and the composition is one that might hold together."

    I'd call them THE BAYVILLE SIRENS! They would run around in tight jeans and shake their booties and fight evil car stealers all day long.

    (did anyone catch the reference?)

    ------------------

    Dear living fire who will find a pleasant surprise in his mailbox for not being dead,

    "How do you kill a zombie? I mean they ARE the walking dead so how does one go about killing something thats already dead?"

    You make them play Soul Calibur 3 until the game's damn AI makes them implode.

    "If winners never quit, and quitters never win, then what's up with "Quit while you're ahead?"

    Oh. That's funny. I always thought the expression was "quit while you're getting head". You know, it would save all the trouble of actually having se- ehm.. yeah, quitting is bad. Or is it?

    "What happens when the unstoppable force collides with the immovable object?"

    The immovable force gets jealous of her husband (unstoppable force) and files a divorce.

    "How would you create a naked singularity?"

    By paying a dressed singularity to take his/her clothes off?

    I'm a naked singularity right now if you don't count underwear.

    "I'm planning on starting a revolution in a country that is a world power. Should I invest legions of religous fanatics, a few nuclear weapons, or a company of midgets armed with electric cattle-prods?"

    Midgets. harder to hit. But electric cattle-prods won't break into my super evil mega fortress of DOOM made out of bubblegum!

    "What would you do if you woke up encased in green Jell-O?"

    Eat myself out and die after 5 chews. But first I'd probably scream a bit due to latent claustrophobia which would develop when faced with the situation.

    "What's more terrifying, a snugglepuss or a cuddlebuns?"

    If anyone ever calls me snugglepuss, I will hit the person hard and then maim him/her with a pair of iron drumsticks.

    Cuddlebuns sounds like something out of a bakery. Mmmmm, cuddlebuns.

    --------------------

    Dear mexican sombrero wielding woman,

    "But super-glue ruins the skin! You wouldn't want a woman whose skin feels like an old couch!

    Why not use leather?"

    Leather is for saturdays. Read the schedule!

    -------------------

    Dear stalker-balker-schmalker-kralker and several other ugly words,

    "This squirrel across the street has been-"

    Get out of my thread.

    ---------------------------

    Dear zidarri who does not belong here, (being an exile)

    "Why is it that masturbation and hand jobs feel so different? They are the same damn thing, in essence."

    Maybe because most women suck at doing it.
    It's either,

    too hard
    too soft
    too slow
    too fast

    YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO HANDLE IT LIKE THE GEARBOX OF A CAR!

    ...NOT A SPORTS CAR!

    "Anywho; why does Mountain Dew RoXXer MY SoXXerS?"

    Because your socks smell terrible?

    // Terrus Nimbulus

  2. #82
    ANBU Captain Zinobi's Avatar
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    Dear Sexfiend,
    Why are teenage girls overdramatic, stuck up, religious "jerks" that hate for saying they look like a cute puppy?

    I'm official.

  3. #83
    ANBU Captain 6Zabuza9's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zinobi
    Dear Sexfiend,
    Why are teenage girls overdramatic, stuck up, religious "jerks" that hate for saying they look like a cute puppy?
    dear terra,
    can you tell me y zinobi asked this?

    ty psj for this sig

  4. #84
    Diego Quality rockmanj's Avatar
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    do you enjoy lingonberries??

  5. #85
    Dear Terracosmo,

    How do I get rid of the voices at night?

  6. #86
    Junior Sexfiend PSJ's Avatar
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    Why do i love to see myself in the mirror?

  7. #87
    Jinchuuriki Knives122's Avatar
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    Why is your name now purple?

    R.I.P Captain America.

  8. #88
    Pirate King ChaosK's Avatar
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    Dear....oh forget it i'm outta something witty,
    What is the perfect bra size?


    LaZie made this...a long time ago.

    "It was a very depressing time in my life, since I had no money I was unable to screw the rules" -Kaiba

  9. #89
    Do you know any people from "Varberg"?

  10. #90
    Jounin Winged Dancer's Avatar
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    I'm supposed to write an essay on the importance of animals when they represent humans in poems that deal with childhood.

    How should I start it? I'm stuck!

    無理してここまでやってきて これからもすっと同じだろう
    それでも何かを信じたい 心の奥の声

  11. #91
    Sexfiend Terracosmo's Avatar
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    Dear person who is about as popular in the IRC channel as I am when I dress black and accompany my mom to church, (which thankfully doesn't happen very often, no offense against god, but damn it is boring)

    "Why are teenage girls overdramatic, stuck up, religious "jerks" that hate for saying they look like a cute puppy?"

    Because teenage guys are adrenalinepumped morons who think with their dicks and loves humiliating others in a vain attempt to get the attention of the girls you mention.

    It evens out.

    ------------

    Dear zabuza with two numbers on each end of his nick which forms a somewhat pleasant sexual position,

    "can you tell me y zinobi asked this?"

    I might be a internet idol, supersexy megacool flamboyant drummer in control of the fate of the universe... but I'm not a fucking mindreader. And I'm glad I'm not. Because if I was, I'd implode due to all the idiocy in the average person's mind.

    -------------

    Dear megaman x6 is too fucking hard,

    "do you enjoy lingonberries??"

    Not the berries themselves, but the "juice". I like eating them together with meatballs, dipping the balls in the juice and then discarding the berries. Yes I know that sentence sounded very mysterious and suggesting, but that wasn't my intention.

    And yes I like meatballs for real and it's not just a funny thing I write because I'm swedish. IT'S PART OF MY GENES!

    ----------------

    Dear somewhatdarkmatter,

    "How do I get rid of the voices at night?"

    Have you tried shutting off the TV? I used to forget that. It almost drew me insane. Can't believe it took so long a time to realize that was the reason.

    -------------

    Dear JSP (looks almost like jasper),

    "Why do i love to see myself in the mirror?"

    Oh, so the image of me I put up on your mirror is working out fine? Glad to hear!

    ----------

    Dear forks,

    "Why is your name now purple?"

    <= because this purple smiley came up to me recently and said "Terra man, you are the only one who can help me, when people see purple they think of me and automatically become sad". So I took it upon myself to wear purple so that people will think of me instead of the smiley. Because when people think of me, they always become happy! The bad thing about this is that people will forget the smiley, and the few who remember him will always see him as the sad pathetic round little thing he is. Don't tell him I said that.

    ---------

    Dear person who wasn't witty to begin with,

    "What is the perfect bra size?"

    If I told you, you wouldn't know what I'm talking about because you don't know shit about bra sizes. ADMIT IT! (because I sure don't)

    -----------

    Dear sandsomething,

    "Do you know any people from "Varberg"?"

    Everyone I knew are dead. DEAD!

    -------------

    Dear woman who for some reason believes I'm the right person to ask about schoolstuff,

    "I'm supposed to write an essay on the importance of animals when they represent humans in poems that deal with childhood.

    How should I start it? I'm stuck!"

    You can start by killing the teacher.

    Animals? Importance? Childhood?

    The only thing I remember about animals from my childhood is an ugly big black dog who took a leak on my mailbox once. ON MY FUCKING MAILBOX! And I still remember it, I was like what, 5? Luckily they killed him off a few years later.

    I still wash my mailbox regularly.

    / Terra Wagner

  12. #92
    ANBU Mr Squiggles's Avatar
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    Dear Terra,
    No matter what I do, gnomes are always watching my every move. It's starting to freak me out. How should I tell them to leave me alone without hurting their feelings? I don't want to upset them because god knows what an angry gnome might do...
    Last edited by Mr Squiggles; Mon, 06-12-2006 at 01:54 AM.

    98% of teens uses or has tried MySpace. If you're one of the 2% that hasn't, copy and paste this in your signature

  13. #93
    ANBU Captain 6Zabuza9's Avatar
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    dear terra,
    i heard every person has another person who looks exactly like the person somewhere in the world. what would you do if you met the person who looked exactly like you? (imagine 2 terras :O:O)

    ty psj for this sig

  14. #94
    If I could change my name
    to Saberfire... I would
    Deadfire's Avatar
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    Dear Terra,

    If you made a utopia, how would you keep everyone smart?

    Is "happy rod" an acceptable euphemism for "joystick?"

    If I think one of my friends is a German/Russian/Azerbaijani spy, what should I do to expose him?

    A hobo is looking at me through the window. I have a rifle three feet away, and a twinky in my hand. What do I do?

    Why is there no 3 dollar bill?

    Why am I so absentminded?

    Why do certain people persist in writing in HUGE LETTERS WITH MULTIPLE PUNCTUATION MARKS??!!??!!

    If 600 people die in Haiti and there are no celebrities around to mock-cry about it to boost their record sales, does anyone notice?

    I am the Angel of Death. What should I do?

    Do I dare Disturb the universe?

    If WW3 started, what would you think would be the result?

    Remember people We do not ask Terra questions because he is qualified, we ask because he is bloody hilarious.
    image fail!

  15. #95
    Awesome user with default custom title UChessmaster's Avatar
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    Dear Terra

    If the black box is almost indestructible, how come planes are not made of it?

    If you come from the shower clean, how come you have to wash the towels?

    Will i ever get my custom title/avatar back?

    Is there something you don`t know so that i can ask you about it?

    What are the 2 new characters for Naruto: Ultimate Ninja?

    Is it Dosu and Zaku?

    If not, how come? we all want to play as Dosu or Zaku.-

    If weiners comes in packages of 10, how come bread comes in packages of 8?

    What does Terracosmos means?

    What does UChessmaster means?

    Who is cooler, Nightcrawler or Gambit?

    What do you mean nightcrawler? Gambit is sooooooo much cooler.-
    Last edited by UChessmaster; Mon, 06-12-2006 at 08:46 PM.

  16. #96
    Sexfiend Terracosmo's Avatar
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    Greetings acolytes.

    --------------

    Dear gnomeobsessed person,

    "No matter what I do, gnomes are always watching my every move. It's starting to freak me out. How should I tell them to leave me alone without hurting their feelings? I don't want to upset them because god knows what an angry gnome might do..."

    Yeah god knows what they'll do, put stones in your shoes?
    What's with you guys and gnomes anyway?
    Sick pervs. I bet you really love having them after you!

    Oh and don't worry about hurting them, GNOMES HAVE NO SOULS!

    ---------------

    Dear zabby,

    "i heard every person has another person who looks exactly like the person somewhere in the world. what would you do if you met the person who looked exactly like you? (imagine 2 terras :O:O)"

    Fuck the living shit out of him is what I'd do.

    ----------------

    Dear foolish fire who runs, runs and clings to life,

    "If you made a utopia, how would you keep everyone smart?"

    People need to be smart in utopia?
    Then why do I always get my shit pillaged?

    We are talking about the online game aren't we?

    "Is "happy rod" an acceptable euphemism for "joystick?""

    Just as much as "bundle of joy" is an acceptable euphemism for balls!

    "If I think one of my friends is a German/Russian/Azerbaijani spy, what should I do to expose him?"

    Make him eat a bratwurst while riding a camel and drinking vodka simultaneously.
    Take a photo of this, and undeniable proof is yours.

    "A hobo is looking at me through the window. I have a rifle three feet away, and a twinky in my hand. What do I do?"

    Throw out the twinky, make him believe he's getting it, shoot him, eat the twinky in front of his corpse, shoot him again. Search through his pockets to find another twinky. Only 5 more for a level up!

    "Why is there no 3 dollar bill?"

    The guy they wanted to have on the bills refused to share his face.

    "Why am I so absentminded?"

    Because you think that Kit is sexier than me, so I've cursed you.

    "Why do certain people persist in writing in HUGE LETTERS WITH MULTIPLE PUNCTUATION MARKS??!!??!!"

    Because they try to imitate me but to no avail. Bunch of losers. NOT EVEN WEARING LIPSTICK!!+01+11!11!

    "If 600 people die in Haiti and there are no celebrities around to mock-cry about it to boost their record sales, does anyone notice?"

    To be honest for once, no. Nobody would notice. Ever. The world sucks.

    "I am the Angel of Death. What should I do?"

    Tell me how I can inherit your title so I can defeat you and become the new angel of death. Man that would be soooo cool. I'd kill Hinata fanboys with my scythe all day long.

    "Do I dare Disturb the universe?"

    You are already disturbing me.

    "If WW3 started, what would you think would be the result?"

    Bombs and a new comics superhero named Major Oklahoma which will strive to defend the entire world from neo-terrorists and violent video games.

    -----------------

    Dear fallen ahou bird,

    "If the black box is almost indestructible, how come planes are not made of it?"

    Read the previous posts god damnit

    "If you come from the shower clean, how come you have to wash the towels?"

    You wash your towels? lol failed

    "Will i ever get my-"

    No

    "Is there something you don`t know so that i can ask you about it?"

    I know everything.

    "What are the 2 new characters for Naruto: Ultimate Ninja?

    Is it Dosu and Zaku?

    If not, how come? we all want to play as Dosu or Zaku.-"

    They are the two guys who acted as Rock and Gai in a filler sometime ago.

    "If weiners comes in packages of 10, how come bread comes in packages of 8?"

    Haven't you heard the fables? One who shall eat 10 breads and weiners on a row shalt forever turn into the shape of a hot dog with mustard

    "What does Terracosmos means?"

    Nimo enim fere saltat sobrius, nisi forte insanit.

    "What does UChessmaster means?"

    That "U" are a Chessmaster?

    "Who is cooler, Nightcrawler or Gambit?"

    What do you mean nightcrawler? Gambit is sooooooo much cooler.-"

    Gambit generally, but not in Evolution.
    Nightcrawler is so cute there that I want to bite him.

    / Terra LeBeau

  17. #97
    Drifter dragonrage's Avatar
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    whats with the purple title, we already know you are bi, there is no need to be a flaming homo . But it does make a statement. Heck its really hard to miss as well.
    ___
    ---------------------------- "THE DROPOUT CREW"--------------------------------
    ________Deblas, IfingHateTonTon, RyougaZell, dragonrage.________

    ________ we may fuck up alot but we always pull thru.




  18. #98
    If I could change my name
    to Saberfire... I would
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    Dear Terra,

    My MPS just dropped below my HGS, and now the RWRR is going to get out of sync with the FLIR, and my BBN-equipped ADAT is going berserk. What do I do?

    If I kill someone in a No Littering zone, should I dump the body somewhere else to avoid a ticket?

    How come on TV when people drive, they're always turning the wheel left and right even though they're driving in a straight line? And why are there always little camera shakes to indicate rough roads, even with a hovercar like in I, Robot

    Sometimes I feel like crying but I just can't, what should I do?

    Have I found the Admin's handbook here?

    If a genie appeared and gave me 3 wishs.....would asking for more wishes destroy the genie?

    What would Jesus drive?

    God impregnated Mary with Jesus without asking and obviously without protection. Mary didn't know about it till God pointed it out. In a legal sense, doesn't that mean God knocked Mary up?

    Should I use common sence or listen only to you?

    How much wood WOULD a woodchuck chuck if he could chuck wood? Assuming that the woodchuck has teeth and the motivation to go out and chuck some wood.

    How many sheets of paper can one tree make?

    Is it half full or half empty?
    image fail!

  19. #99
    Jounin Winged Dancer's Avatar
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    Hunny,

    Something sweet oh something strong,
    Since my love no longer can turn me on,
    The girls in the suits and those girly boys,
    I gave my life to rock 'n roll?

    無理してここまでやってきて これからもすっと同じだろう
    それでも何かを信じたい 心の奥の声

  20. #100
    ANBU Captain 6Zabuza9's Avatar
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    dear terra.

    can you give 3 solutions to all of deadfire's questions?

    ty psj for this sig

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