Scrubs

[anphorus]

Oh |I watch it too, as does nearly everyone I know, but I'm just behind a bit on season four.

And Dr. Cox is the man!

Quaoteage time!

Kelso: Thanks I owe you one
Dr.Cox:[voice-over] MUST RESIST URGE TO RUB IT IN HIS FACE... MUST RUB SOMETHING IN SOMEONE'S FACE.
[turns to an unconscious patient]
Dr.Cox: So how's that coma going for ya there?
Dr.Cox:[Voiceover]ahhh much better!

Dr.Cox: I don't know if they taught you this in the land of fairies and puppy dog tails where you obviously, if not grew up, then at least spent most of your summers, but you're in the real world now! N'kay?

Dr.Cox: Well now Maggie, I can only assume you are wiling away the morning cat chatting with your favorite gal pal because you have already finished your pre-rounding
JD: I haven't even started yet
Cox: What?
JD: Gotcha! Finished!
Cox: That's a good one newbie, my heart is racing, you are quite the prankster
JD: I could tell you some stories
Cox: And if there is a god in heaven, you never will. This is Mrs. Grayson's chart, her private practice doctor just showed up so I am off this one
JD: Is there anything I need to do for her lung nodule?
Cox: Oh, I don't know, what do you say you start her off on 20 cc's of it's not my problem anymore...

Greatest ever:

Dr.Cox: Let me go ahead and share a little something special with you that i like to call "Perry's perspective":
One, if someone is standing in front of me in line at the coffee shop and can't decide what they want in the half hour it took to get to the register then I should be allowed to kill them;
Two, I am fairly sure that if they took all the porn off the internet, there would be only one website left and called "bring back the porn";
Three, and most importantly of all, the only way to be respected as a doctor and a man is to be an island, you are born alone, you damn sure die alone. isn't that right spike? The point is, and you might want to jot this down, only the weak need help.

I've always likeed the janitor too. He's even better when you leanr that about 99% of his lines, the actor just comes up with on the spot.

[el_boss]

My favourite quote ever is when Turk has just made some operation in record time and when comes out he says to the previous record-holder who has a full beard:

Turk -"In your face doctor beard-face"
The other guy-"It's Beardfacey"

lol I nearly pee myself everytime I see this part.

@anphorus: Welcome to the club five!

[Assassin]

Turk - Babe, you gotta understand. A guy will sleep with any woman he finds attractive, no matter how he feels about her. If Tyra Banks drove her car over my mom and then offered to have sex with me, I'd have to dial 9-1-1 in the nude because my pants would already be off!

Dr. Cox: You know, Bob, I've been thinking of all the times you manipulated me and toyed with me and I can't help but recall that children's fable about that race between the tortoise and the pain-in-the-ass-chief-of-medicine-that-everybody-hates. You see, Bob, the pain-in-the-ass-chief-of-medicine-that-everybody-hates kept running out in front of the tortoise and taunting him, but right at the end... oh, gosh I'm sure you remember what happened Bob, the tortoise bit clean through the Chief of Medicine's calf muscle, dragged him to the ground, where he and all the other turtles devoured him alive right there on the racetrack. It's a disturbing children's book, Bob, I know, but it's one that stuck with me nonetheless.