Naruto Script!

[LobsterMagnet]

Okay guys here's a fun game I think someone suggested. So lets take a crack at it to pass the time as we so patiently await the return of real naruto. I'm going to start off a script and who ever feels inclinded to do so continue it on in what ever direction you like. Anything goes since I want to see if any crap we throw in can outdo the fillers in terms of quality.

The sun shines brightly on the leaf village as a the dawn of a new day begins. But little do the shinobi of konoah know that a dark shadow looms in the distant. While the villages number 1 hyper active ninja naruto prepares to eat is daily portion of ramen

Naruto: I'm hungry. It's time for me to get some breakfast so I can continue my training to become the next hokage. Oh look who is that over there? It's Sakura.

Naruto deviates from walking over to the ramen stand and walks over to greet Sakura

Naruto: Hello Sakura-chan. Your looking very nice today, you want to come and help me with my training today?

Sakura: Nope I'm sorry, I can't I have to buy some flowers to and spend three hours praying at the shrine. If I keep this up maybe just maybe sasuke will came back.

An embittered and sexually frustrated naruto walks away. With his hormones raging. Then suddenly a huge explosion rocks the village and a troop of big breasted female samurai walk in from the clearing dust

Take it any direction you see fit. I'm curious to see what you guys do with this kind of opening. Remember anything goes.

[ChaosK]

hey, u stole my shakespeare analogy with the 1000 monkeys and...oh nevermind...

an add on

naruto: HENGE!
naruto changes into an older sasuke and all the girls run up to him, the end.

[Divinity]

Jiraiya watches from atop of a building. He hears the rumbling sound and takes out his telescope to have a good look. Zoomed in so far, all he saw was a black spot. As he zooms out, He suddenly gets excited.....

Jiraiya: WHOA!!! So big!! (play Fooling Mode song from soundtrack 2)

Jiraiya's eyes turns to hearts.

Tsunade: Jiraiya whats that noise?

Jiraiya: I hit the jackpot! Oh and there are so many!!!

Tsunade: Huh?

Tsunade takes a look to the left to see all the big breasted female samurai that walked in. She begins to get mad and you see the X-like vein mark on the top right of her head.

Tsunade: JIRAIYA!! Now's not the time! (smacks Jiraiya.)

[Assertn]

it soon comes to the viewer's attention that this village of Konoah is actually a bizzarro version of the Konoha village, complete with the same named/looking characters. However, as the dark shadow looms closer to the village, a gateway is about to be unlocked, connecting the two dimensions together for the first time in 10,000 years.

[LobsterMagnet]

And the big breasted samurai girls reveal thier true identities, as the bizzaro versions of all the leaf village female ninjas! And since their so evil that is why their breasts are far larger then their normal counter parts. They have developed a lethal new taijutsu where they use their enlarge breasts to combat the leaf village ninja. An epic battle between the forces of depravity and decency is about to begin.

[ChaosK]

the girls run around town demanding sex, all the guys give in and fall powerless after the rough sex.

[Divinity]

Tsunade demands hot sex from Jiraiya and then all of a sudden Tsunade turns old again showing wrinkled tits and Jiraiya gets completely disgusted and runs for his life.

[Splash!]

Tsunade: Well! That takes care of that, now its time to handle these samurais. Something must be done!
(Shizune shows up)
Shizune: Tsunade sama, what are we to do? With all these female samurais doing our men, they have no strength left for us.
Tsunade: Thats not good at all !!
(Sakura shows up dragging an elder looking version on Sasuke to Tsunade by the neck)
Sasuke:AAAAAGGH! *cough* Sakura chan, let go!!
Sakura: No i won't. Now transform back , you idiot!
(Sasuke transforms into Naruto)
Sakura: (to Tsunade) Sensei, maybe Naruto can help us solve this little crisis. My ugly face may not be very helpful in bringing the men back to the women of Konoha but Naruto has a technique that might help us, the Sexy Jutsu

[The Heretic Azazel]

Nevermind this post..

[LobsterMagnet]

Tsunande: We most stop this threat immedietly for the future of the leaf village is at stake! If these intruders should continue to distract our men then there is no chance for the leaf village ninja to reproduce. WIth no successor generation the leaf village will die out. That is why we must stop these big breasted samurai once and for all to preserve our future.

Tsunande summons naruto to her office

Tsunande: Naruto I never thought I'd see this day come. We need your to use your harem no jutsu to save our village.

naruto transforms using his harem no justu and confronts the evil big breasted samurai woman

Naruto: we challenge you to a wet t-shirt contest!

[Dunpar]

ahhh man i was hoping to add to the harem no justu..... o whelllll.....damm..

naritor" a bright day shines on the village of konoha........whell whats left of it......"(play the fooling music)::women are draging there "beat" ment to there homes in streachers....including one Sakura draging a only slitley scrashed Naruto.....

Naruto: Aaaaa... after all the big breasted women saw you beat me...... thay all left me alone.......(crying) WHY DID YOU DO THAT SAKURA.....WHY.....
Sakura: Simple... becouse if im not geting any from the REAL Sasuke the i dont see why Sasuke's form should get some...
Naruto:ahhhhhh...... maby you just want to be with m...(sakura beats the living shit out of naruto)....e......
(kakashi is seen on a street pole in front of the group.......)

[Jadugar]

@Dunpar : You can easily qualify fot the job of those 1000 monkeys.

[LobsterMagnet]

Didn't think it was humanly possible but I believe we've produced something worse then the fillers, sigh.

[Carnage]

Then, suddenly, out of nowhere comes out this fat man with a bucket of KFC in his hands and a I[img]i/expressions/heart.gif[/img]George Lucas hat on top of his chubby head. He yells for help:

Fat man: " Help! Anakin has killed the youngins! Anakin has killed the youngins!"
Naruto: " OMG! NO! REALLY?!!!?!?!?"
Fat man: "Yes you stuppid little shit! Now comeon! We have to go save Anakin from turning into Darth Vader!"
Naruto: " Dont worry, fatass! I'll help u out dattebyoooooo!
Fat man: " Great! but can we stop by KFC first? I need more chicken!"
Naruto:" Fine! But this will proably turn out into one of those 4 year old toilet jokes! But what the hell! Lets do it!"

They both run to KFC, eat, do a toilet joke scene, and leave to save anakin. They both Approach Anakin:

Fatman: " NOOOOOOOO! ANAKIN! Dont Turn to the dark side!"
Anakin: "Who the fuck are you?????"

Suddenly Anakin Skywalker attempts to choke Naruto, but suddenly there is an uber plot hole and Naruto escapes with fart jokes. Then Naruto naruto slaps Anakin, calls him bitch, and does his 1000yrs of pain attack which somehow defeats Anakin (fucking plot holes). The day is saved, the fatman goes back to his basement to memorize that weirdo language from startrek, and Naruto goes back to his Ramen shop to make fart jokes.


The End.

Next time: Naruto hits puberty! Oh No! Not more Fart Jokes!!!!![img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-shocked.gif[/img]

Edit: This thread has potential, someone make a post dammit!

[shinta|hikari]

Then all of a sudden, Hinata appears and undresses in front of Naruto at the ramen shop, saying *take me, now*, but Naruto refuses, at the same admitting to all of Konoha that he is in fact in love with sasuke, and has only gone after sakura in the past to make him jealous.
Sasuke - I... I didnt know...
Naruto - What? Sasuke, you are back!
Sasuke - yes, I heard your confession, and I decided to leave my pimp oro and go back to have it out with you.
Naruto - oh thank you great Hokage!!
Tsunade - heh what is it?

then all of a sudden, the kyuubi awakens and rips out of naruto, With narutos blood, guts, and gas spilling everywhere, sasuke walks into the sunset, back into oros arms.

The kyuubi then molests all the little kids in konoha still in ninja school.

[Mr Squiggles]

And then Kakashi wakes up again... *sigh*

Meanwhile, in the far away Forest of Dark Secrets, the dark lord Shinbun, master of illusions and dreams, starts cackling maniacly:
'Soon, soon I will finally be able to get revenge on the konoha ninja who for some lame reason only worthy of a filler I hate! But until then, I shall keep inflicting strange dreams upon them. Also, please note that I have some vague ties to Itachi or Orochimaru so now naruto can come after me."

[LobsterMagnet]

Finally things are getting interesting

Lord Shinbun stares into his crystal ball. Because I am Orchimaro's mother's sister's inlaws godson I shall ensure the secret behind oros hidden mansion stays a secret because I overheard him talking about it at the annual family picknick gathering. Using my advanced genjutsu techniques I shall look into the hearts of konoaha greatest ninja's in order to use their heart's darkest desires against them. But first go out my generic cannofodder ninja and attack the village! Before my minions arrive at the leaf villiages gates I will ensure that each of the elite jounin are taken out of commision using my fuwimaka-no-justsu technique to mentally destroy them.

"Lord Shinbun gazes into his crystal ball and he sees Gai, he recoils as he is given privledge to gai's innermost thoughts. He sees gai sitting in a dark room while rock lee in a g-string dances suggestively upon a thin metal pole. Upon seeing this lord Shinbun uses his advanced super secrete genjustsu technique to alter the dream. Gai looks startled as rock lee changes into ten ten."

"Next he pears into the mind of Asuma Sartobi and sees him happily laying on a grassy field smoking a large cigarr. Lord Shinbun activites his jutsu and transports Asuma to a dark cold city in another dimension NEW YORK CITY. Asume finds himself sourrounded by hundreds of anti smoking activits and horrible Truth advertisments his beloved cigar is ripped from his mouth and doused with water. He can only scream in horror as his greatest pleasure is taken away from him."

[Divinity]

A perverted ninja sneaks into Konoha.

"Sex Possession No Jutsu!"

Kurenai is affected by this jutsu and suddenly has the urge for some hot stuff. The ninja rapes her and there's nothing Asuma can do because he is in NYC.

[Carnage]

Originally posted by: Divinity
A perverted ninja sneaks into Konoha.

"Sex Possession No Jutsu!"

Kurenai is affected by this jutsu and suddenly has the urge for some hot stuff. The ninja rapes her and there's nothing Asuma can do because he is in NYC.

I wish you could make a comic for us * With specific details plz*

[darkmetal505]

Originally posted by: Divinity
A perverted ninja sneaks into Konoha.

"Sex Possession No Jutsu!"

Kurenai is affected by this jutsu and suddenly has the urge for some hot stuff. The ninja rapes her and there's nothing Asuma can do because he is in NYC.

jeez.... thats just not right... i dont know what to say to you