Funny stories

[Jakins]

I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and we
decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends
encouraged me. And my girlfriend? She was a dream!
There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed. It was her younger
sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight
mini skirts, and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near
me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be
deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding
invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I
was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't
overcome and didn't really want to. She told me that she wanted to make
love to me just once before I got married and became committed to her sister
for life.
I couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if
you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was
frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top
she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me.
I stood there for a brief moment, then turned and went straight to the front
door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house and walked straight
towards my car. I was surprised to find my future father-in-law standing
outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy
that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for better man for
our daughter. Welcome to the family."


The moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car.

[thundrakkon]

And this is the reason why the world is in such moral decay. Your last comment was funny, but very disturbing. The divorce rate in the US is around 50%, which is not too great. Why get married if you don't want to be loyal and spend the rest of your life with your significant other?

Oh well, that's life, and everyone lives with their own decisions.

[PSJ]

hahah that one was really, really funny.

[Jakins]

Originally posted by: thundrakkon
And this is the reason why the world is in such moral decay. Your last comment was funny, but very disturbing. The divorce rate in the US is around 50%, which is not too great. Why get married if you don't want to be loyal and spend the rest of your life with your significant other?

Oh well, that's life, and everyone lives with their own decisions.

Chill out a little. U think morals are that different than they were say 150 years ago? Well sexualy at least. No, the same shit went on thats always gone on, just not in your face like today. Also we no longer have the church telling us we'll burn in hell for our sins

[SK]

hahaha that was good, nice story, and btw thundrakkon, you gotta chill man dont take everything so seriously.

[Koyuki]

haha, that's a good one

[Eurasian]

AHAHA!! that's funny.

[thundrakkon]

Alright, everyone's entitled to their own opinions. Yeah, the story is supposed to be light and humorous, and I should take it as such.

It just touched on a subject (relationships) that has created a lot of pain for my friends in the past (some of which have no faith in marriage or loyalty anymore), and I might have over-reacted. Sorry to spoil your fun, guys.

[Jakins]

Lol, No biggeys eh?
I've no faith in marrige either, but loyalty is possible....just choose right!

[KitKat]

I agree that that story, although humourous, is a sad comment on our society. But I like to have faith in people that marriage can be a loving lifelong commitment if the two people can work through the difficulties rather than giving up.

Anyways, I have lots of funny stories, but I can't seem to remember any of the good ones at the moment. This story will have to do:

We have a cat that likes to drink out of the toilet. I know, that's gross, but cats do it and it doesn't really seem to hurt them. So one day, my brother spotted our cat, perched on the toilet seat with his head in the toilet bowl, having a little drink. My brother got an idea. He crept to the door of the bathroom, very slowly and very quietly, and when he was close enough yelled, "BAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!". The cat was so scared that he jumped, but in the process lost his balance and fell completely into the toilet! He then bolted out of the bathroom, looking like a drowned rat, and didn't show his face for the next few hours as he tried to recover his dignity. It was one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

[oceen246]

I like that story Jakins. I got in trouble one day for keeping condoms in the car, cause my girl was counting them, so you should be carefull with that too.

edit: can you hook me up with the sister, haha, just playing!!!!

[Uzumaki Naruto]

roflmao!, man i was looking for a good laugh too thanks man u made my day

[Terracosmo]

I totally agree with thundrakkon, the world is a fucking piece of shit when it comes to relationships... and to most other things too for that matter.

Story was funny though. i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif

[Lefty]

LOL. thats a calssic.

[Assertn]

Jakins is referring to stories you know/found.....not necessarily stories that involve you. It sounds too fabricated for his marriage story to actually be something that happened to him!

at least....it sounds like it is......i/expressions/face-icon-small-confused.gif

[kAi]

jhaha...like the story

[Rek]

damn... it kinda sucks we started off with that one... its too good.. no one will post another story, because it can't compare.

except for KitKat, who has no dignity

[Jakins]

hehe, thought it'd get appreciated, might post another later on....still waiting to see if others can bring'em on

[KitKat]

Originally posted by: Konoha Rek
damn... it kinda sucks we started off with that one... its too good.. no one will post another story, because it can't compare.

except for KitKat, who has no dignity

What? No dignity? Ok, so maybe my story was less funny, but at least it was true. I've seen the other one a few times in email forwards, and it gets old pretty fast.

Just because I love you all, I'll add on a bonus picture. i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif

http://img74.exs.cx/img74/8168/Ringaroundthekitty.jpg

[KaneInferno]

cats are cool

[Eurasian]

do u allow ur cat to lick u???

[Assertn]

lol, im pretty sure a cat's tongue is cleaner than your hands are

[Eurasian]

WHAT?!?! my hands don't touch toilet water. ur mean.i/expressions/face-icon-small-mad.gif

[Mut]

gw's #1 rule = no girls

/me waits for assertn's 'no girls' pic from family guy.

anyway, i'll post some funnies from irc.

[11:10] <Mut[at]t[at]> i remember back in hs
[11:10] <Mut[at]t[at]> this one guy said he was goth
[11:11] <Mut[at]t[at]> so i stomped on his face
[11:11] <Gods_Son> that's what I'd do to Charlf00 if I saw her
[11:11] <Charlf00|AFK> really?
[11:11] <Charlf00|AFK> oh well
[11:11] <Gods_Son> I'd stomp that goth outta you
-------------------------------------------
[19:19] <Gods_Son> <TheGodFather> hahaha
[19:19] <Gods_Son> <TheGodFather> i didnt know i had a son i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif
[19:19] <Gods_Son> <Gods_Son> do I know you?
[19:19] <Gods_Son> <TheGodFather> lol no
[19:19] <Gods_Son> <TheGodFather> nvm
[19:19] <Gods_Son> <TheGodFather> The God Father... Gods Son
[19:19] <Gods_Son> <TheGodFather> nvm i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif
[19:19] <Gods_Son> <Gods_Son> I got it
-------------------------------------------
[14:40] <Krbadass> Nobody is as strong as kakashi.
[14:40] <Mut[at]t[at]> ...
[14:40] <Mut[at]t[at]> kakashi > kyubi
[14:40] <Krbadass> Exactly.
[14:41] <Gods_Son> ...
-------------------------------------------
[18:52] <Mut[at]t[at]> i'm christian
[18:53] <Mut[at]t[at]> NM, what are you?
[18:53] <NarutoMaster> a senior
[18:53] <Mut[at]t[at]> what?
-------------------------------------------
[00:01] <Stoopider> Is Naruto he only one in Konoha village with yellow hair?
[00:02] <CmDr_RavEn> he does, doesn't he? the kyubi is his limit!!!!!!111
[00:02] <Stoopider> Uzumaki clan.
[00:02] <AssertnFailure> hmm.....
[00:02] <AssertnFailure> there mightve been some random chick with blond hair
[00:02] <Stoopider> Hmm. could be related.
[00:02] <AssertnFailure> well there's tsunade, anyway
[00:02] <CmDr_RavEn> that settles it
[00:02] <Stoopider> Tsunade has yellow hair?
[00:02] <CmDr_RavEn> tsunade is his mother
[00:02] <Gods_Son> Temari has blonde hair
[00:02] <Gods_Son> Tsunade is a whore
[00:02] <CmDr_RavEn> it's obvious
[00:02] <Arcness|Haku_san> o.o
[00:02] <Joker-kun> is anyone here hungarian?
[00:03] <Gods_Son> No
[00:03] <Arcness|Haku_san> O.o
[00:03] <Stoopider> No.
[00:03] <Gods_Son> where the fuck did that come from

just enjoy them and go to #gotwoot on irc.rizon.net you ass hats.

[thundrakkon]

Originally posted by: Mut@t@
gw's #1 rule = no girls

/me waits for assertn's 'no girls' pic from family guy.

Now don't be so upset that none of them are willing to hook up with you. i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif

Without the ladies, Gotwoot will be a lonely place... well, unless you enjoy male companionship... i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif

That's some funny stuff you have there on irc. i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif