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TheBladeChild
Thu, 11-20-2008, 03:01 AM
Just put here anything interesting you heard/read that you thought was funny or interesting.

"You guys really pissed me off from last week's quiz, I dont understand what you dont understand"

-my fluid mechanics professor

context:he said this to my whole class, because the average on the last quiz was like in 50s out of 100.

Nadouku
Thu, 11-20-2008, 03:09 AM
"Women are like squared numbers; if they're under thirteen just do 'em in your head!"

Too many quotes on Don McMillan's commentary on PowerPoints, so here you go:

How NOT to use PowerPoint! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cagxPlVqrtM)

Buffalobiian
Thu, 11-20-2008, 04:04 AM
My favourite from Einstein would have to be:

"Logic well get you from A to B; Imagination will take you anywhere"

TheBladeChild
Thu, 11-20-2008, 04:14 AM
I just realized another one from like a couple of weeks ago:

A Teacher's assistant of mine, was showing a presentation using Pro-E(3-D engineering software):

"You see how smoothly that shaft goes into that hole?"(as he says this he moves the shaft back and forth in the model's hole)

*long quiet pause in the room*

*TA realizes what he just said and did*

*class bursts out laughing*

*Professor shakes his head*(probably thinking: "omg these idiots...")

even funnier quote just moments after this:

TA:"hehe...im soo fired"

Xelbair
Thu, 11-20-2008, 06:11 AM
"Laziness is mother of all inventions" - My old physics teacher saying.

Nadouku
Thu, 11-20-2008, 02:34 PM
I'm in a distress right now. Some guy keeps saying "Ignorance is a blessing" while I say "Ignorance is Bliss." What should I tell him? Should I just ignore him?

XanBcoo
Thu, 11-20-2008, 03:36 PM
I'm in a distress right now. Some guy keeps saying "Ignorance is a blessing" while I say "Ignorance is Bliss." What should I tell him? Should I just ignore him?
The saying is "Ignorance is bliss." Look it up for him to prove it or just tell your friend he's wrong. He probably won't stop saying it in either case.

Xelbair
Thu, 11-20-2008, 04:58 PM
"Never a good guy will get to be a king,
you have to be a big son of a bitch to get there"
Mordimer Madderin, from polish fantasy cycle of inquisitors.

Nadouku
Thu, 11-20-2008, 04:58 PM
The saying is "Ignorance is bliss." Look it up for him to prove it or just tell your friend he's wrong. He probably won't stop saying it in either case.

I see. Thanks for the tip! And the guy was just some random guy, not someone I know. :p

Death BOO Z
Thu, 11-20-2008, 05:34 PM
I'm in a distress right now. Some guy keeps saying "Ignorance is a blessing" while I say "Ignorance is Bliss." What should I tell him? Should I just ignore him?

are you distressing about it? then that guy has won.
he's proving that the fact that you know the true words of the proverb is hindering you, while he, who is ignorant of the correct way of saying the sentence, is in a state of bliss.

that really is a metaphysical argument.

Nadouku
Thu, 11-20-2008, 05:41 PM
are you distressing about it? then that guy has won.
he's proving that the fact that you know the true words of the proverb is hindering you, while he, who is ignorant of the correct way of saying the sentence, is in a state of bliss.

that really is a metaphysical argument.

Eh, it kind of bothers me when people try to correct my quote "Ignorance is Bliss" to "Ignorance is a Blessing." Anywho, I already corrected him and he has sent his apologies, so we're fine now.

"Think once and you'll have to do it; think twice and you'll have to do it again; think a third time and you've already completed it." - Anonymous

The Heretic Azazel
Thu, 11-20-2008, 06:41 PM
"Throughout human history, as our species has faced the frightening,
terrorizing fact that we do not know who we are, or where we are going in
this ocean of chaos, it has been the authorities, the political, the
religious, the educational authorities who attempted to comfort us by
giving us order, rules, regulations, informing, forming in our minds their
view of reality. To think for yourself you must question authority and
learn how to put yourself in a state of vulnerable, open-mindedness;
chaotic, confused, vulnerability to inform yourself." -- Timothy Leary

"Keep on rotting in the free world" -- Jeff Walker (singer of CARCASS)

Nadouku
Thu, 11-20-2008, 06:52 PM
"Throughout human history, as our species has faced the frightening,
terrorizing fact that we do not know who we are, or where we are going in
this ocean of chaos, it has been the authorities, the political, the
religious, the educational authorities who attempted to comfort us by
giving us order, rules, regulations, informing, forming in our minds their
view of reality. To think for yourself you must question authority and
learn how to put yourself in a state of vulnerable, open-mindedness;
chaotic, confused, vulnerability to inform yourself." -- Timothy Leary

This quote is very true about the aspects of life itself.

Buffalobiian
Thu, 11-20-2008, 07:06 PM
The seven deadly sins. Food, clothing, firing, rent, taxes, respectability and children. Nothing can lift those seven millstones from man's neck but money; and the spirit cannot soar until the millstones are lifted. - George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)

It's why I go to work

Assassin
Thu, 11-20-2008, 09:12 PM
"The most incomprehensible thing about the universe is that it is comprehensible" - Einstein.

and just a random funny one, but by far my favorite....

"Women may be able to fake orgasms, but men can fake whole relationships"

Zinobi
Thu, 11-20-2008, 09:49 PM
"Life's a garden, dig it" - Dirty Joe
:P

darkshadow
Fri, 11-21-2008, 05:12 AM
z? is that really you? ;'(

Animeniax
Fri, 11-21-2008, 05:58 AM
I've always like this quote:

"You cannot hope to build a better world without improving the individuals. To that end each of us must work for his own improvement, and at the same time share a general responsibility for all humanity, our particular duty being to aid those to whom we think we can be most useful." -Marie Curie

Though I'm not sure where I read it.

Xelbair
Fri, 11-21-2008, 06:48 AM
If that quote if from this famous chemist, who discovered Polon and Rad, her full name is Marie(polish Maria) Skłodowska-Curie, she had 2 surnames.
"If you can't teach something to your grandma, you don't know it." - Einstein

Animeniax
Fri, 11-21-2008, 08:08 AM
I think she married into the Curie name. Her husband Mr. Curie was also a physicist.

Xelbair
Sat, 11-22-2008, 05:02 AM
Chemist not physicist. His name was Peter(Pierre in French - he was french) if i remember correctly

Animeniax
Sat, 11-22-2008, 08:43 AM
Marie is listed as a chemist and Pierre as a physicist, at least on wikipedia.

Abdula
Sat, 11-22-2008, 01:42 PM
Abdula has a response pre-written to every question before they're even asked
That is just beautiful:cool:

Nadouku
Sun, 11-23-2008, 08:09 PM
"The ancient Greek definition of 'happiness' was the full use of your powers along lines of excellence." - John F Kennedy

"The secret of joy in work is contained in one word: excellence. To know how to do something well is to enjoy it." - Pearl S. Buck

"I awake in a world that I'm partly made of, and a world that is partly my own making." - Rich Mullins

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." - John Fitzgerald Kennedy

Animeniax
Sun, 11-23-2008, 11:26 PM
JFK was full of shit. He's one of the primary reasons the Vietnam war was such a fiasco. He's a hypocrite with a bunch of soundbite quotes that he neither lived by nor really believed in.

Nadouku
Mon, 11-24-2008, 12:23 AM
Yea, he goes by what the Greeks use as their definition of happiness. I really wonder though, does all that power really bring happiness to someone? Everyone has their own definition of happiness, but it's so broad.

Buffalobiian
Wed, 01-07-2009, 08:54 AM
"One shall blush when the fire of the heart will rise to grant the eyes of the other a loving view."
.................................................. .............................-DB_Hunter



"One shall blush uncontrollably when one gets smacked in the face with a baseball bat."

.................................................. .............................-Board of Command

Junior
Thu, 01-08-2009, 10:03 AM
Good one Buffa. XD Had me laughing.

One of my favourite quotes is 'Memento Mori'.

Translated to 'Remember you are mortal' or 'Remember your death' or 'Remember you will die' etc. (I finally noticed it in the P3 opening. it flashes by so damn quick)

Another favourite is: Don't beg for things. Do it yourself or you won't get nothing.

Nadouku
Thu, 01-08-2009, 12:49 PM
"The use of our imagination is limited to the fallacies of our desires." - Anonymous

DB_Hunter
Thu, 01-08-2009, 12:58 PM
"One shall blush uncontrollably when one gets smacked in the face with a baseball bat."

.................................................. .............................-Board of Command

One's entire body shall blush when's one's baseball bat is shoved up one's arse

Xelbair
Thu, 01-08-2009, 02:15 PM
So true, so true.

Paper
Thu, 01-08-2009, 03:02 PM
"You can get a bitch with a nice car and fancy things, but it takes more then that to get a lady"



-my uncle (under the influence)

Xelbair
Thu, 01-08-2009, 04:37 PM
"Praise the lord and pass the ammunition!"

Kakashi_Solo
Thu, 01-08-2009, 05:06 PM
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
- Dorothy Parker

But some of the best quotes come from Scarface!!

In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.

Every day above ground is a good day.

The best: Say 'ello to my little friend!

Yes I'm a Scarface fan :p

Animeniax
Thu, 01-08-2009, 05:33 PM
"Today I didn't even have to use my AK. I gotta say it was a good day."

The Heretic Azazel
Fri, 01-09-2009, 12:35 AM
"You show me a tropical fruit and I'll show you a cocksucker from Guatemala"

complich8
Fri, 01-09-2009, 10:29 AM
"Yeah, she's a homeowner. 'cause she's a 'ho, and she's a moaner!"
~ my officemate

Munsu
Fri, 01-09-2009, 11:06 AM
"You show me a tropical fruit and I'll show you a cocksucker from Guatemala"
-George Carlin

My favorite quote.

Paper
Fri, 01-09-2009, 12:07 PM
"Yeah, she's a homeowner. 'cause she's a 'ho, and she's a moaner!"
~ my officemate


lol that's the funniest quote I heard all day, correction* that's the funniest thing period I heard all day lol

Nadouku
Sun, 01-18-2009, 05:27 PM
"Don't argue with idiots; you'll lose. They'll drag you down and beat you with experience." -- Anonymous

Paper
Sun, 01-18-2009, 07:15 PM
"Don't argue with idiots; you'll lose. They'll drag you down and beat you with experience." -- Anonymous


that's so true

Kakashi_Solo
Thu, 01-22-2009, 02:17 PM
Lol at this:
'It's kind of like going from an Xbox to an Atari,' an Obama aide says

This will make the quote make sense ;)
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28787998/

Deadfire
Thu, 01-22-2009, 02:31 PM
Fuck the fucking fuckers.

Refering to a couple of people. no idea what the reason.


You fucks, are the worse fucking idiots I have had to teach this fucking class on this fucking subject. Get your Fucking heads out of your fucking ass or your mom's fucking tit and focus on this fucking shit.

Get the fuck out.

You would think that this is sort of crude, however after dealing with this sort of vocal abuse over many times. He basically is saying 'that it's not hard to learn this sort of thing just takes time.'

XanBcoo
Thu, 01-22-2009, 02:39 PM
"I am not usually accused, even by my friends, of a modest or retiring disposition."
- Winston Churchill

One of the most quotable men in history. I have that one on a mug. Translation: Don't mess with me.

Xelbair
Fri, 01-23-2009, 04:02 PM
Refering to a couple of people. no idea what the reason.



You would think that this is sort of crude, however after dealing with this sort of vocal abuse over many times. He basically is saying 'that it's not hard to learn this sort of thing just takes time.'
Hmm - sounds so boring compared to polish. We have like 10 different words for "fuck", and each can be changed to -off -ing -ed -er, etc., some even have 2 versions for one form.

Kakashi_Solo
Sun, 01-25-2009, 05:06 PM
Hmm - sounds so boring compared to polish. We have like 10 different words for "fuck", and each can be changed to -off -ing -ed -er, etc., some even have 2 versions for one form.

you might have more words. But unless you got someone who can say "Fuck you" like Tony Montana it doesnt count :P

XanBcoo
Sun, 01-25-2009, 05:58 PM
Hmm - sounds so boring compared to polish. We have like 10 different words for "fuck", and each can be changed to -off -ing -ed -er, etc., some even have 2 versions for one form.
I bet you don't have expletive infixing though. English is pretty good at that.

It's ri-goddamn-diculous.

Deadfire
Sun, 01-25-2009, 06:34 PM
Target spotted.
Target down.
...
Wait, that's a tree...


and some good Russian ones for good measure.



Do not touch anything unnecessarily. Beware of pretty girls in dance halls and parks who may be spies, as well as bicycles, revolvers, uniforms, arms, dead horses, and men lying on roads -- they are not there accidentally.


One of the serious problems in planning the fight against American doctrine, is that the Americans do not read their manuals, nor do they feel any obligation to follow their doctrine...


The best tank terrain is that without anti-tank weapons.

Buffalobiian
Mon, 01-26-2009, 12:01 AM
Men lying on roads....that one's hilarious :D

Buffalobiian
Tue, 01-27-2009, 07:42 AM
.....Klein's agency set up a website called findpatrickmcdermott.com — but it was a clever trap to find McDermott by showing investigators the locations of people logging on to the site.

Klein began tracking hits from what he believes was a boat travelling along the Mexican coastline as far as South America.......



"The rule of thumb is always this — when you're running you are always looking over your shoulder and we're going to catch him looking at us,"
.................................................. ....................................- Some Private Investigator.

Link to article where it came from (http://news.ninemsn.com.au/entertainment/733638/newton-johns-former-partner-alive-on-the-run)

Damn you, criminal psychologists :mad:

Sometimes you just have to wonder how good law enforcers really are, in both a positive and negative manner.

Nadouku
Tue, 01-27-2009, 10:32 AM
"Don't think too hard. Thinking can get you killed." -- Anonymous

Xelbair
Tue, 01-27-2009, 12:55 PM
"Remember that your weapon is made by lowers bidder" - anonymous to army guys

TheBladeChild
Tue, 01-27-2009, 05:59 PM
"..."-RyougaZell

complich8
Tue, 01-27-2009, 10:12 PM
psh. Stole my line >_<

Paper
Thu, 01-29-2009, 11:19 AM
"Just 'cause they don't scream when you use them, don't mean they're not little."

-Samuel L. Jackson words towards a Child Molester in Lakeview Terrace while putting the club to his throat

Killa-Eyez
Thu, 01-29-2009, 02:41 PM
"The crucial question of the day is; do you say what you think, or talk what you hear?"
by Stickz from Opgezwolle. Used that quotation against my chief operator, since he was throwing all kinds of familiar sayings... He didn't know this one! :p

Nadouku
Thu, 01-29-2009, 02:44 PM
"Excellence is a broad term, but I must say that it's the achievement between your standards and the expectations of others." -- Gregor Jorgenson

Buffalobiian
Wed, 09-02-2009, 11:18 PM
"[It was] Usually German shepherds, Labrador retrievers, size-comparable things. It all started because the dog started it. The dog would come and start trying to hump your leg and I'd be like, Wow, that's interesting."

~ Fox Wolfie Galen - zoophiliac

http://www.vanityfair.com/culture/features/2001/03/furries200103

Animeniax
Wed, 12-29-2010, 12:55 PM
"I think we've become wussies. ... We've become a nation of wusses. The Chinese are kicking our butt in everything. If this was in China do you think the Chinese would have called off the game? People would have been marching down to the stadium, they would have walked and they would have been doing calculus on the way down."

- Pennsylvania Governor Ed Rendell commenting on the cancellation of an NFL game during this week's snowy weather.

DeathscytheVII
Wed, 12-29-2010, 02:20 PM
We're all scared. You hid in that ditch because you think there's still hope. But Blithe, the only hope you have is to accept the fact that you're already dead. And the sooner you accept that, the sooner you'll be able to function as a soldier is supposed to function. Without mercy. Without compassion. Without remorse. All war depends upon it.


-Ronald Spiers, Band of Brothers


Sin is underrated

-My old accounting prof

Kagemane_no_Jutsu
Wed, 01-05-2011, 12:30 AM
A quote revisited during a lecture I was listening to by the late, great, Terence Mckenna.

------------------------------------------------------=====-----
Marshall McLuhan- We drive into the future using only our rearview mirrors.
------------------------------------------------------=====-----

Buffalobiian
Wed, 01-05-2011, 07:15 AM
“By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” -Benjamin Franklin

I prove this right all too often. :(