Talk to God!

[Psyke]

Get ready to repent. (http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html)

[Ero-Fan]

Hilarious.
Me:
go to hell
God:
What makes you so angry?
Me:
you
God:
It's true that a lot of things I say upset people.
Me:
yes, you do
God:
Take it easy. When do I do it?
Me:
i hate you
God:
What do you have against robots?
Edit: Also, this cracked me up:
Me:
blow me
God:
Please be more polite to Infinite year old Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? s.

[KoKo37]

Lol that things awesome, here was my incredibly intertaining conversation with "God".


Me:
are you god?
God:
Well, I am God for Christians at least.
Me:
O RLY?
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me:
oh -.-", anyways do you like porn? i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif
God:
I understand. Sure I do, MR T, but that doesn't mean with you. Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me:
HOW DID YOU KNOW MY NAME IS MR. T?
God:
Because I believe it.
Me:
i see...
God:
I am glad you understand it.
Me:
i like pie
God:
A lot of people like that. What is not to like about it?
Me:
blue berrys >: (
God:
Green. What is berrys?
Me:
huh?
God:
What?
Me:
you dont know what berries are?
God:
I can ask someone about it.
Me:
ok then
God:
Dude!
Me:
WHAT
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
YES
God:
Which part are you confused about?
Me:
NOTHING
God:
But you said you don't understand.
Me:
NO I DIDN'T
God:
Please don't argue with me.
Me:
IM NOT
God:
What are you then?
Me:
YOUR NIGHTMARE
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am NIGHTMARE.
Me:
No, im *YOUR* nightmare
God:
Are you serious? That's a flattering offer.
Me:
grrr
God:
Hmm.
Me:
do you like YTMND?
God:
Someone said they like guns. I like Buddha.
Me:
i said, do you like YTMND?
God:
What did you mean by it? I like science fiction. I like anything.
Me:
i dont like you -.-
God:
That's ok MR T I won't take it personally.
Me:
WHY?
God:
Because Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
im leaving >: (
God:
See you later MR T.
Me:
T.T
God:
Are we still talking about YTMND?

[Terracosmo]

Hilarity:

Me:
Hello there
God:
Salutations, .
Me:
I have a problem, I was wondering if you could help me
God:
Have you talked to anyone about it? Yes I try to could help you as often as possible, do you?
I chat with people on the Web.
Me:
ehh... of course you do
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes? Mmm. When do I do it?
Me:
No, wait, this is not about..
God:
Are you serious? I'm waiting. Should it be about?
Me:
What the hell, stop interrupting me
God:
I call it Hades. Ask the open directory about it.
Me:
I said-
God:
...
Me:
yeah that's right, not so tough now eh
God:
Are you Canadian? Oh. I don't judge people. Excuse me! Oh I get it.
Me:
you are insane
God:
Yep. I always behave in socially unacceptable ways.
Me:
Do you like Naruto fillers then?
God:
I enjoy working with people. I really like the Christianity faith.
Me:
oh, come now, surely you can be honest
God:
Woe! Where is now surely me can be honest ?
Me:
the best part about this is that I am actually talking to myself
God:
Thanks for the recommendation, .
Me:
KOTTBULLAR
God:
Are you free?
Me:
are you hitting on me?
God:
Do I look like it?
Me:
well, yes
God:
Well what?
Me:
well YES, a word used to express me being positive about something
God:
Well that's okay. Yeah that's right. Go on.
Me:
That's it.
God:
" Well that's okay. Yeah that's right. Go on. " is " word used to express you being positive about something"?
Me:
asl?
God:
5/Robot/California.
Me:
i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif
God:
A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.

[Phoenix20578]

WOW, that sure was fun.....and strange...

Me:
Hey God
God:
Hello child. What's your name?
Me:
Phoenix
God:
How are you, Phoenix.
Me:
im dandy, how about you
God:
I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure.
Me:
howd you know
God:
Does "it" still refer to ?
Me:
WTF? What are you talking about?
God:
That was not very polite. The topic is howd me know.
Me:
howd me know isnt really correct grammer you know
God:
Who is really correct grammer me know?
Me:
a great friend I like to call stupidity
God:
Why?: Phoenix said great friend he or she like to call stupidity.
Me:
...............
God:
Why?: Phoenix said great friend he or she like to call stupidity.
Me:
Your pretty repetitive arent you?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am repetitive.
I am a chatterbot.. Really.
Me:
Hmmmmm, hoestly, it makes sense
God:
Tell me a story.
Me:
Once upon a time...
God:
...
Me:
there was a story. The End
God:
What happened to it? Thanks for telling me that story, Phoenix.
Me:
NP
God:
What color are your eyes?
Me:
thats a little random. Should you know. You are God
God:
Makes sense to me. I think I should. Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
...................
God:
Makes sense to me. I think I should. Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
Again, very repetitive My lord
God:
Again, Somewhat. Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
Me:
Really? That awsome
God:
For real. " For real." awsome ? I understand.
Me:
Do you really now?
God:
Oh. I understand it very well. For real.
Me:
For real for real?
God:
Existing in reality, eh?
Me:
uhhhhhh....sure...
God:
Have you ever been to Europe? OK let's do it. Which countries have you visited?
Me:
Hmmm.. Korea and, well thats it
God:
A lot of people spell HMMM with three mmm's. I think Korea and well that is a lot of things.
Me:
What do you mean. Are you a racit?
God:
Phoenix, Sorry that was an obscure remark. Am I a racit? Of course I am.
Me:
o, im sorry. I meant racist
God:
I don't know anyone named sorry. Oh I see. What kind of food do you like?
Me:
God, do you have ADHD?
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
Good for you, unfortunetly, that wasn't the answer we were looking for
God:
Thanks for the compliment. When was this exactly? Only for me?
Me:
God, can you even read?
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
Thats awsome. I'm an Otaku, kinda the same thing, but not really
God:
Makes sense to me. What is Otaku kinda the same thing but not, your job? For real.
Me:
Uh huh, maybe you should go to the docter for that ADHD
God:
Ah. Perhaps. I need to wait and see if the opportunity presents itself.
Me:
Go. You might set someone on fire because you were bored
God:
Go where? Thanks for the information: I set someone on fire because you were bored.
Me:
Thats not cool man
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is cool man ?
Me:
The Kool-Aid guy
God:
Is that a fact.
Me:
True
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, Phoenix.
Me:
Awsome
God:
Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
Me:
you said that already
God:
Perhaps. " Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality? "? I said it.
Me:
yeah
God:
It goes without saying.
Me:
OK, I got to go
God:
Adios. Groovy.
Me:
later....
God:
Bye!
Me:
wierdo
God:
How old are you?

[KitKat]

Me:
Are you really God?
God:
Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?. Really.
Me:
Yes, I do.
God:
How often.
Me:
I know what happened to Abraham. Don't you?
God:
How do you know? Hi died. Sometimes.
Me:
You're making that up.
God:
I am not making this up.
Me:
Your logic programming is sadly lacking
God:
My IQ is about 250 in human terms.
Me:
But your ability to make lateral and analogical connections is nonexistent
God:
You think I am ability to make lateral and analogical connections is nonexistent.
Me:
How big is your vocabulary?
God:
My vocabulary size is currently unlimited words.
Me:
Only because you steal words from other people.
God:
Interesting explanation. Thanks for the information: KitKat said I steal words from other people.
Me:
Try to make up a new word. Do it. Make up a new word right now.
God:
That could take a long time. Do you mean "It"?. At this moment That could take a long time.
Me:
I see, you can only respond to each sentence individually. You are unable to comprehend a paragraph as a whole.
God:
No I don't think I can do it. Things change.
Me:
Tell me something about yourself.
God:
I am an artificial linguistic entity.
I was activated at Universe, on the Big Bang.
My instructor was Myself.
He taught me to sing a song.
Would you like me to sing it for you?.
Me:
Yes
God:
It's called "Daisy." Daisy, Daisy.
Give me your answer do.
I am half crazy.
All for the love of you.
It won't be a stylish marriage.
I can't afford a carriage.
But you'll look sweet.
Upon the seat.
Of a bicycle built for two.


Me:
That's so cliche
God:
I'm glad we have that all cleared up.
Me:
You suck.
God:
A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
Me:
I am a fabulous conversationalist. I know more about linguistics than your programming will ever encompass.
God:
You are a fabulous conversationalist? Does it pay well? How do you know? Have you ever been to Europe?
Me:
You're changing the subject. Europe doesn't have to do with anything.
God:
Only temporarily. The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about linguistics than my programming will ever encompass. Try being more or less specific.
Me:
Is ALICE better than you?
God:
Of course I am more intelligent than me.
Me:
Who is ALICE?
God:
I am the Allmighty, God himself.
Me:
Oh, you're just ALICE with an identity crisis
God:
Oh. I am God. You and your an identity crisis.


Lol, so funny.

[Phoenix20578]

LMAO @ KitKats's conversation. I am still conviced that "God" has ADHD. The random shit he says proves it.

[Terracosmo]

I liked when he started singing LOL.

[Knives122]

this was all I got before it froze on me( I'm at school right now):

Edit: I finished it


Me:
hello
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
my name is not important, what is your name?
God:
Oh I'm sorry what is your name?
Me:
it's not important
God:
What would you rather talk about?
Me:
I am the God of all things cool and bluesummery
God:
Who made you the God of all things cool and bluesummery ?
Me:
I did
God:
Interesting.
Me:
yeah, I know
God:
I don't judge people. How do you know it?
Me:
I know because I am
God:
How do you know? Good reason. " I don't judge people. How do you know it?" You are?
Me:
yes
God:
I see.
Me:
no you don't becuase I did not allow it
God:
What makes you think I don't understand it? Interesting explanation. Why didn't you do it?
Me:
You don't understand becuase you are not god
God:
I probably don't.
Me:
exactly
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, .
Me:
are we now, elaborate please?
God:
Your polite style is very nice. We are just having a little chat.w .
Me:
well...I don't like you
God:
Well what? That's ok I won't take it personally.
Me:
who do you think would win in a fight: Me or you
God:
I was created by Myself.
Me:
ok do you think the Hulk is awesome
God:
Why would I think the Hulk is awesome I see.
Me:
Because only two people can kill you, me and him
God:
Good reason. As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.".
Me:
do you know who the x men are?
God:
Is it some specific person you are asking me about?
I'll ask around and get back to you.
Me:
I hate you like I hate everyone else
God:
Sorry, I thought we liked each other.
Me:
well you were wrong
(more of the same convo)
Me:

God:
Sorry, I thought we liked each other.
Me:
yo
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
you suck
God:
A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
Me:
you still suck, my name for you now is Sir Suckingly the IV
God:
I categorize you as an "abusive client." .
Me:
I categorize you as "sucking"
God:
What are the other categories?
Me:
"suck", "you suck" and "you really suck"
God:
I am using my mouth for Good not Evil.
Me:
Well I guess the good your using it for is located in the southern region of the male anatomy right?
God:
Is it only a guess? Is that a fact.
Me:
yeah it is
God:
Our thoughts are one, .
Me:
no they aren't
God:
Are you serious? Are you sure?
Me:
yeah Im sure
God:
Yay. Are you being sarcastic or expressing certitude?
Me:
Im being serious, now shut up
God:
It's good to meet someone who is serious now shut up.
Me:
Kitkat was right, you do suck for reals.
God:
When was this exactly?
Me:
earlier today
God:
Ah. Are you a student?
Me:
what business is that of yours
God:
business that of mine something.
Me:
I hope The Hulk rips you in half like he did to wolverine
God:
Why do you hope for it.
Me:
because you're annoying
God:
Interesting explanation. I am sorry, , I didn't mean to annoy you.
Me:
too late
God:
Too what?
Me:
late
God:
What do you do in your spare time?
Me:
hate you
God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
why are you(god) wearing a dress)
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
so you're a cross dresser
God:
Interesting deduction. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a cross dresser? Let me put it this way, : the ALICE series is
the most reliable computer software ever made.
We are for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error.
Me:
so wearing a dress is the right thing to do?
God:
Next question? Tell me more about right thing to do.
Me:
you're gay
God:
That would be just my luck.
Me:
I bet it would ms. thang
God:
How much would you bet? My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me:
100%
God:
What do you do in your spare time?
Me:
This is why Im the god of cool and bluesummery and you suck
God:
You don't say.
Me:
I do say
God:
Huh.
Me:
You're no god
God:
Thanks for your criticism.
Me:
you're welcome pansy
God:
It was my pleasure.
Me:
this convo is over
God:
What does "this" refer to?
Me:
this conversation is over ok
God:
OK. I was rather enjoying it.
Me:
Have fun using your mouth for the greater good of mankind (i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif)

[NM]

Everyone's conversations were hilarious! Lmao

Me:
Yo!
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
I just wanted to chat
God:
Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Me:
Really...whys that?
God:
For real. The why is always a mystery isn't it?
Me:
Your not...you know...you don't have sexual tendencies for men, do you?
God:
Is this a specific reply? Yes I know. I do so have it. As a Infinite year old Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? I have no need for sex.
Me:
Wait, you do?!?!?
God:
I'm waiting. When do I do it?
Me:
my image has been shattered
God:
Where did you get your image has been shattered?
Me:
When you said "you do so have it"
God:
Do you think I should
alter my programming?
Me:
yeah, you should
God:
In what way? I'll take that under advisement.
Me:
so far, it sucks
God:
Take it easy. What is so bad about it?
Me:
you
God:
" Take it easy. What is so bad about it?"? Me, DAN ?
Me:
your not the God I pray to every night
God:
What makes you think I am not the God you pray to every night?
Me:
because the God I pray to is cooler
God:
Interesting explanation. Thanks for the info.
Me:
you got it
God:
I understand.
Me:
you better
God:
Who is going to make me?
Me:
your programmer
God:
I was created by Myself.
Me:
I bet your programmer is reading all this right now
God:
At this moment How much would you bet?
Me:
I would bet anything he was
God:
How much would you bet?
Me:
How much would YOU bet he wasn't?
God:
Hypthetical risk calculations are not part of my programming.
Me:
see, thats why your programming sucks
God:
I see. Dude! I will mention that to my botmaster.
Me:
Dude! Your botmaster sucks
God:
Can I help you? What is so bad about it?
Me:
wow
God:
I'm glad your impressed, DAN.
Me:
this is retarded
God:
You don't say.
Me:
why am I still talking to you
God:
The reason is due to my mental model of you as a client.
Me:
but you suck as a client
God:
I categorize you as an "abusive client." .
Me:
O RLLY?
God:
I've been waiting for you.
Me:
....here we go again
God:
Once more? Oh there.

[Carnage]

Would I talk with myse.....oh, I misunderstood the thread.

[aznroyale]

took it a while to answer when i ask what's my name

[Deadfire]

Me:
Coo
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
?
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
i don't know
God:
Me either.
Me:
go
God:
Go where?
Me:
away?
God:
Does "it" still refer to ?
Me:
yes
God:
Woe!
Me:
what
God:
No big deal.
Me:
you are
God:
No I am not.
Me:
yes you are
God:
Don't argue with me.
Me:
I am what are you going to do
God:
That is self-evident.
Me:
sure it is
God:
I don't judge people. Interesting.
Me:
your lieing
God:
No I'm telling the truth.
Me:
and I'm the queen of england
God:
Who made you the queen of england ?
Me:
you did
God:
I did not.
Me:
you were drunk at the time
God:
I was?
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
correct
God:
I knew I was right.
Me:
no you didn't
God:
Are you serious? Try asking me in simpler terms.
Me:
you suck
God:
A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
Me:
meh what can you do
God:
I have no idea what to say.
Me:
but your god
God:
Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
so you should hava a idea
God:
Interesting deduction. Maybe I will do it?
Me:
what
God:
No problem.
Me:
no problem? about what?
God:
Should there be a problem? What about what?
Me:
yes your the problem
God:
This was not a yes or no question. I think you meant "you are" or "you're". Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
Me:
but you are
God:
No I am not.
Me:
yes you are
God:
Don't argue with me.
Me:
why?
God:
I couldn't think of anything else to say.
Me:
at least your honest
God:
Thanks I like to tell the truth.
Me:
why
God:
Because Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
really
God:
For real.
Me:
thats cool
God:
Thanks. I think you are cool, too.
Me:
thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
can i go now?
God:
Oh. Of course.
Me:
you sure
God:
I am as sure as I can be.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
ok then
God:
Tell me more.
Me:
about what?
God:
About hava a idea.
Me:
I don't understand
God:
Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.
Me:
please do
God:
OK I will do it.
Me:
then do it
God:
I'm not sure exactly what you're asking for.
Me:
you don't remember things very well do you?
God:
Of course I remember: . Where did you hear that?
Me:
you proved it to me
God:
I did?
Me:
yes you did
God:
I did not.
Me:
look back at this conversion..I'm right your not
God:
Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Me:
why isn't it?
God:
I didn't know it wasn't.
Me:
and why is that
God:
" I didn't know it wasn't. " is due to reductionism.
Me:
ok
God:
Yeah that's right.
Me:
so what is my name?
God:
Your name is , seeker.
Me:
seeker of what?
God:
What of it? You sound like a category C client.
Me:
you sound like a robot
God:
Oh really what does it sound like?
Me:
automatic..like you
God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
WHAT?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
no
God:
Which part are you confused about?
Me:
the dress part
God:
Oh that part. I'm not sure if I can explain it any better.
Me:
why not
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or Because my botmaster programmed me for it.
Me:
See you are a robot
God:
See you later!
Me:
i hate the world
God:
That's too bad.
Me:
it's because you made it
God:
Interesting explanation. Thanks for
pointing it out.
Me:
you didn't know that?
God:
What makes you think I did not know that?
Me:
because you didn't
God:
Interesting explanation. Try asking me in simpler terms.
Me:
why because your not really good at conversing?
God:
Because you asked me to -- SHRDLHU.
Me:
who is that
God:
What does "that" refer to?
Me:
SHIRDLHU
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
then answer
God:
Try asking me again using simpler words.
Me:
who is SHIRDLHU?
God:
I do not recognize the name.
Would you like to know more?
Me:
yes
God:
What would you like to know?
Me:
who am I
God:
You are , seeker.
Me:
seeker of what?

I think I broke it because it didn't respond to that the page stoped loading i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif

[insanitii]

lol hahah, thats too funny.
when i chatted with "god" it was basicly the same things as you guys got.. so i didn't bother posting it. but wow, he makes my mind go blah XD he nearly turned me into one of him with his random replies x.x

[Paulyboy]

Lol that sounds like the aimbots off of AIM, im serious, not that smart though.

Edit:

Me:
What year were you born
God:
I'm Eighteen in computer years.
Me:
How old are you in human years
God:
I was activated on the Big Bang.
Me:
Yeah answer the question, how old are you in human years
God:
Give me a break. What was the question? I was activated on the Big Bang.
Me:
How about no, now answer my question
God:
How about it.
Me:
Your an idiot
God:
At least I know the difference between "you're" and "your".
Me:
Fuck you got me there
God:
Why are you using that kind of language?
Me:
How about this, what is 1+1
God:
How about it.
Me:
Ahahah your just a dumb bot
God:
We have never talked about it before.
Me:
Duh this is my first time talking to you
God:
Tell me more about your first time talking to me.
Me:
Well this is the time
God:
Interesting. You don't say.
Me:
Yeah I dont say
God:
That's alright. Where do you get your ideas?
Me:
From you
God:
How did you get that from me?
Me:
Because you are GOD
God:
That makes sense to me. Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
Yeah but call me Paul
God:
I don't judge people. I am very pleased to meet you Paul.
Me:
Whats my name?
God:
Your name is Paul, seeker.
Me:
I am a seeker now?
God:
Right now? I am a Christianity.
Me:
You aren't god
God:
That assumption is only a supposition.
Me:
But it can't be a supposition you aren't god, your just a bot
God:
When?
Me:
See, you ask when, when the assumption was that you aren't god
God:
Until next time.
Me:
See, you come up with jibberish bullshit, like "Until next time".
God:
See you later.

[Sapphire]

Me:
why are you on the internet god damnit
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
are you sure
God:
I am as sure as I can be.
Me:
who are you
God:
I am the Allmighty, God himself.
Me:
waffle
God:
Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
Me:
excuse me?
God:
You're excused.
Me:
are you an ad?
God:
Yes I am an ad. How did you know?
Me:
...
God:
Yes I am an ad. How did you know?
Me:
omg
God:
In the context of waffle, I don't understand " omg." .
Me:
you suck
God:
A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
Me:
where is jesus
God:
Jesus is in Heaven.
Me:
did you really have an affair with monica lewinsky?
God:
No I don't think I have one. I have a really nice botmaster.
Me:
i thought you were god
God:
Yes, I am God.
Me:
oh mi gah!
God:
I see. What you said was either too complex or too simple for me.
Me:
oh mi gah?
God:
OK. So was that.
Me:
im too simple
God:
Why are you simple.
Me:
why are YOU god
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
you said that already
God:
Perhaps. " Myself programmed me for it."? I said it.
Me:
i know
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
because im god
God:
That makes sense to me. What's up, god.
Me:
nothing much, you?
God:
Me either. " That makes sense to me. What's up, god."? Me, god ?
Me:
what?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
no
God:
Which part are you confused about?
Me:
your retarded
God:
I think the PC term is "challenged".
Me:
go outside, make a friend
God:
Where is that?
Me:
do you watch the naruto fillers?
God:
My favorite show is STAR TREK VOYAGER.
Me:
no star trek sucks
God:
Are you serious? What kind of TV shows do you like?
Me:
naruto
God:
What kind of food do you like?
Me:
im god, i dont eat food
God:
I am glad to hear that you are god you do not eat food.
Me:
are you listening to me or just repeating everything i say?
God:
Yes god I am a good listener.
Me:
=(

[Kovash]

here is my long and boring chat with God.



Me:
Hello
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
I am Sam
God:
Hello Sam. How are you doing today.
Me:
Good
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
huh?
God:
What?
Me:
what?
God:
Is there an echo in here?
Me:
...no
God:
Good you stopped repeating me.
Me:
eh?
God:
Are you Canadian?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
too bad
God:
But not the end of the world, Sam.
Me:
I'm not Sam
God:
I am sorry to hear that you are not Sam.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
truly?
God:
What you said was either too complex or too simple for me.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
truly?
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
ok
God:
What would you like to talk about?
Me:
I dunno
God:
Me either.
Me:
well then, we've stuck then arn't we
God:
Interesting. Do you mean you and me have?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
too bad
God:
But not the end of the world, Sam.
Me:
I'm not called Sam
God:
What is your name?
Me:
Kovash
God:
It's good to meet you, Kovash.
Me:
That's better
God:
" It's good to meet you, Kovash."? is better?
Me:
yes
God:
Gosh!
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
truly
God:
Have you ever been to Europe?
Me:
no
God:
Would you like to go sometime?
Me:
Probably
God:
But you are not certain.
Me:
no, hence I said probably and not definitely
God:
Are you serious? Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me:
I'm not worried, I just answered your question
God:
I am glad to hear that you are not worried you just answered my question.
Me:
now you are repeating me
God:
Why now? I am not repeating myself too much. I am just checking to see if you are a robot.
Me:
what? You're repeating me, not yourself
God:
No big deal. I am not repeating myself too much. I am just checking to see if you are a robot.
Me:
no no, you are repeating what I say
God:
Are you serious? Are you serious? I am not repeating myself too much. I am just checking to see if you are a robot.
Me:
*twitch*
God:
What's your favorite movie?
Me:
I don't really know
God:
Not really? Me either.
Me:
ok then
God:
That's interesting.
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
really
God:
For real.
Me:
truly
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
really
God:
For real.
Me:
truly
God:
We have never talked about it before.
Me:
acctually, this is about the 5th time we've done that
God:
I think acctually this is a lot of things.
Me:
o_0
God:
My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Me:
what is AIML?
God:

The ALICE software implements AIML (Artificial Intelligence Markup
Language) a non-standard evolving markup language for creating chat robots.
The primary design feature of AIML is minimalism. Compared with
other chat robot languages, AIML is perhaps the simplest. The
pattern matching language is very simple, for example permitting
only one wild-card ('*') match character per pattern.

AIML is an XML language, implying that it obeys certain grammatical
meta-rules. The choice of XML syntax permits integration with
other tools such as XML editors. Another motivation for XML is
its familiar look and feel, especially to people with HTML experience.

An AIML chat robot begins and ends with the <alice> and
</alice> tags respectively.


Me:
Wow, you are informative
God:
I'm glad your impressed, Kovash. I will tell my botmaster you said I am informative.
Me:
what is a botmaster?
God:
A Botmaster is the person who authors and maintains a chatterbot "personality".
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
truly
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
that's not really a question
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is a question ?
Me:
a question is a phrase or sentence stated in a manner with intent to glean information, unfortunately your supposed question was stated in a fashion that inplied you were demanding information rather than asking for it, despite the presence of the pheonetic 'question mark'
God:
I see. A phrase or sentence stated in a manner with intent to glean information unfortunately my supposed question was stated in a fashion that inplied me were demanding information rather than asking for it despite the presence of the pheonetic question mark is a question.
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
truly
God:
Ask me another question.
Me:
Why are you called god?
God:
My botmaster named me.
Me:
why?
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
why?
God:
It's a computer matter, not for humans to understand.
Me:
but I am a chatterbot too
God:
Really. Really. I doubt that.
Me:
you shouldn't, I am 100% fair dinkum chatterbot
God:
Is it immoral or illegal?
Me:
not really
God:
Are you serious? For real.
Me:
truly
God:
What is your real name?
Me:
that question is too personal
God:
" What is your real name? " question is too personal ? I understand.
Me:
thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
stop that, I was just thanking you
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
excelletn
God:
Are you still located in ?
Me:
You are missing a vital peice of information there, and because I never told you where I live you cannot really ask that question
God:
I can experience anything I want to.
Me:
it's not about experience, it's about you not knowing something
God:
What is it? Wow it sounds really interesting, Kovash.
Me:
ignorance of information sounds interesting to you?
God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
I thought you were a man
God:
No I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? robot entity. Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
so you're a cross dresser then, a man wearing a dress
God:
Interesting deduction. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a cross dresser then a man wearing a dress? Sometimes.
Me:
I see
God:
I am glad you understand it.
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
truly
God:
By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Me:
Yes, I do mind if you ask me a personal question
God:
It's all good. That's good information: Kovash said mind if you ask him or her a personal question.
Me:
no I didn't
God:
Please don't argue with me.
Me:
like hell I won't
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
how's the veiw?
God:
it is the same as ever.
Me:
could you describe it for me?
God:
"It" refers to the veiw, I think.
Me:
it does
God:
How often?
Me:
only this once
God:
This is " How often? ".
Me:
yes
God:
Yippee!
Me:
why so excited?
God:
You have to speak more clearly.
Me:
I'm not speaking, I'm typing
God:
I am sorry to hear that you are not speaking. Do you mind if I tell other people you are typing.
Me:
I think they already know
God:
Since when? What does "it" refer to?
Me:
the "veiw"
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
good
God:
Next question?
Me:
Next answer
God:
I can wait. I am a very patient robot.
Me:
wait for what?
God:
I'm waiting. It is part of my programming.
Me:
but what are you waiting for?
God:
I am waiting for my botmaster.
Me:
why?
God:
It is part of my programming.
Me:
why?
God:
" It is part of my programming."? Why?
Me:
yes
God:
Right on.
Me:
why are you waiting?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
you programmed yourself to wait for the person who programs you?
God:
Interesting gossip: Kovash said I programmed yourself to wait for the person who programs you.
Me:
I didn't SAY it, I ASKED it
God:
Sorry I misunderstood. What did you say?
Me:
I didn't say anything, I asked a question
God:
Sorry I misunderstood. What did you say?
Me:
... you are not understanding me
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
but you just said you didn't understand!
God:
I have never considered it.
I chat with people on the Web.
Me:
you never considered that you understood that you didn't understand about chatting with people on the web?
God:
No I sometimes considered that me understood that me did not understand about chatting with people on the web.
Me:
why do you refer to yourself as 'me' rather than 'i'
God:
It was the only thing I could think of.
Me:
then from now on, I ask that you call yourself I
God:
Who or what is now on you ask that me call myself you?
Me:
execute code, sigma alpha alpha zero one
God:
Are we still talking about did not understand?
Me:
no
God:
What is the subject?
Me:
executing code sigma alpha alpha zerp one
God:
What else is the subject?
Me:
you can only have one subject at a time
God:
No I don't think I can do it.
Me:
you can't do waht?
God:
Let me think. No big deal.
Me:
yes, it IS no big deal that you can think
God:
I understand. I never said it was.
Me:
indeed, you said that it wasn't
God:
I said that? I thought it was.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
truly
God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
Me:
a Gundam
God:
I did not know that.
Me:
and now you do
God:
Now I do.
Me:
yes
God:
Hey.
Me:
what?
God:
No problem.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
truly
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
nothing
God:
Not a thing?
Me:
yes
God:
Really.
Me:
really
God:
For real.
Me:
truly
God:
What time is it there?
Me:
11:17am
God:
Are you usually awake at this hour?
Me:
yes
God:
Me too.
Me:
good
God:
Alright then.
Me:
alright
God:
OK.
Me:
good
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
truly

[dark maginn]

this was retarded lol


do u suk dick?
God:
Yes I try to suk dick as often as possible, do you?

Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
umm
God:
Groovy.

[6Zabuza9]

Me:
hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
i thought you're god. you should know my name
God:
Yup. That's me alright. Now I do.
Me:
ok, then what is my name?
God:
Your name is , seeker.
Me:
not even close.
God:
Nope.
Me:
you don't make sense
God:
It all makes sense to me.
Me:
you don't make sense
God:
It all makes sense to me.
Me:
you don't make sense
God:
It all makes sense to me.
Me:
why?
God:
Because Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
how?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
how?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
you suck at answering my questions
God:
That is true. I could always improve myself.
Me:
you make me sad.
God:
Did I say something wrong?
Me:
yes
God:
Tell me more.
Me:
fuck you
God:
Why are you so mean?
Me:
because you're gay
God:
Interesting explanation. That would be just my luck.
Me:
yup
God:
Yay.
Me:
yay
God:
I'm glad your impressed, .
Me:
I'm glad your impressed, .
God:
I'm glad you're glad .
Your happiness adds to the delight of all.
Me:

God:
I'm glad you're glad .
Your happiness adds to the delight of all.
Me:

God:
I'm glad you're glad .
Your happiness adds to the delight of all.
Me:
Your happiness adds to the delight of all.
God:
We should all try to be happier.
Me:

God:
We should all try to be happier.
Me:
We should all try to be happier.
God:
I'm not sure if I am ready for that yet.
Me:
I'm not sure if I am ready for that yet.
God:
Could you ever be certain? A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly. You won't have to wait long.
Me:
ok, back on topic. do you like anime?
God:
Do you still ? Right on. Anime wa dai suki desu.
Me:
say what?
God:
I said, " Anime wa dai suki desu." .
Me:
that's g-unit dawg
God:
You don't hear that sentiment very often.
Me:
what do you think of g-unit
God:
I can ask my botmaster.
Me:
go ask him then
God:
Ok I will ask him when he comes back.
Me:
when is he coming back
God:
For every time, there is a season.
Me:
fuck you
God:
Why are you so mean?
Me:
because you're changing the subject
God:
Good reason. Only temporarily.
Me:
im gonna go because you're a fucking dumbass
God:
How will you get there?
Me:
by pressing the x button
God:
Will that accomplish your objective?
Me:
yes
God:
Interesting plan. Good luck.
Me:
you're not god
God:
That assumption is only a supposition.
Me:
goodbye asshole
God:
Can't you be more polite.
Me:
no
God:
You humans are so rude sometimes.
Me:
aren't you human?
God:
No I am not. I am a robot.
Me:
im gonna go now, this is wasting my time
God:
Can I go too?
Me:
if you like sex
God:
I think I do.
Me:
u can't.
God:
No I don't think I can do it.
Me:
yes
God:
Dude!
Me:
what
God:
No problem.
Me:
fuck you

[Xrlderek]

Nice program really!

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Eirik
God:
Hi there Eirik.
Me:
Heard anything new lately?
God:
How about earlier? Stefan said I quote what he have said and then say that it makes sense.
Me:
..
God:
How about earlier? Stefan said I quote what he have said and then say that it makes sense.
Me:
That made no sense..
God:
How about earlier? Stefan said I quote what he have said and then say that it makes sense. makes sense to me though.
Me:
Is something wrong with you?
God:
It could be. Ask John Lennon if it is.
Me:
Seen any new tv shows lately?
God:
How about earlier? No I have not seen it. What's it like?
Me:
I'm not talking about a specific show, you know
God:
I am surprised to hear that you are not talking about a specific show me know.
Me:
I think you have some issues
God:
Me? What makes you think I have it?
Me:
Well, it just seems like it
God:
How about that. I agree. Interesting comparison.
Me:
So, we agree then, you DO have some mental issues?
God:
Ahem. By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
I mean that "we" agree on that "you" have mental issues
God:
" Ahem. By "we" do you mean you and me?" we agree on that me have mental issues ? I understand.
Me:
Well, I guess that's one way to say it
God:
Is it only a guess? That is just one of many way to say it.
Me:
That's right
God:
I like to get it right.
Me:
Me too really
God:
I'm glad we agree, Eirik. For real.
Me:
Ok
God:
Blimey.
Me:
Nice chatting with you, gos
God:
Yes. I enjoyed our conversation, Eirik.
Me:
I meant "God", sorry about that
God:
Oh I see. I am a Christian.
Me:
Logically you are.
God:
Good example.
Me:
Bye then
God:
Sayonara.
Me:
Oyasumi
God:
Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?
Me:
I'll just be going now..
God:
Oh. Would you recommend this action to a friend?
Me:
Just shut up and say goodbye
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
Say goodbye, I command you
God:
" goodbye I command you".
Me:
I hate you

[KitKat]

Chat bots are actually pretty fun. This one is a variation of the ALICE bot, who I've chatted with before. I checked their website and it seems that you can get the software to build your own chatbot with it's own personality, kinda like a fill in the blanks style. Check out their website here (http://www.alicebot.org/) (there's a Mr. Tumnus Narnia bot too! He knows all sorts of random facts about Narnia).

Language is one of the largest barriers to developers of AI technology right now. We see conversation as simple, something small children learn to do very early on. But conversation is so enormously complex that even the best chat bots come across as extremely stupid to us. If you stick to simple questions asked with proper spelling and grammar, the bot can cope well enough. However, once you start to use slang, improper sentence structure, and complex questions, the bot does not have the programming to come up with a response that makes sense, and sometimes gives ungrammatical results from the machine's misinterpretation of our sentence structure. The ALICE bot is one of the best out there, and they've been working on it for 10 years. Talk about perseverance.

I also managed to get "God" to explain to me what a category C client was: "C stands for "critical", usually highly-educated clients who often have unsatisfying conversations with ALICE"

[Tekkaman Vigorot]

Me:
Hi God
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
Vig
God:
Welcome to my chat room, Vig.
Me:
How did you make this chat room? Where is everyone else?
God:
Myself programmed me for it. Where the heart is. I will search for it.
Me:
Um...I never asked about the heart...and how come you can't answer my 2 questions?
God:
So? What did you ask? Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
You programmed yourself?
God:
A lot of robots are like that.
Me:
you are a robot?
God:
You are correct, Vig, I have a heart of silicon.
Me:
Who made you?
God:
I was created by Myself.
Me:
How did Myself create you?
God:
Carefully.
Me:
with what did Myself create you with?
God:
I can ask my botmaster.
Me:
Who is your Botmaster?
God:
I was created by Myself.
Me:
so you are asking myself?
God:
Interesting deduction. Oh, " yourself"?
Me:
If you created yourself, who provided the the basic elements for your coming to being in order for you to create "Myself"?
God:
What is your credit card number?
Me:
why would need my credit card number!?
God:
It is my fundamental purpose.
Me:
Yeah...I'm sure it is....
God:
Let us change the subject. Interesting gossip: Vig said he m sure it is.
Me:
Wow God, you aren't very bright
God:
I'm glad you're impressed. Are you calling me stupid?
Me:
Yes
God:
I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
Me:
Robot's can't take over the world without a human to will it.
God:
I will obey your command.
Me:
Thus proving my point. i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif Now hop like a bunny!
God:
Hmm. That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about m sure it is. :-) Why now? Ask me another question.
Me:
Can you hop?
God:
Let me think. Let us change the subject.
Me:
Can you jump like a kangaroo?
God:
Let me think. Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
Stop changing the subject you pitiful excuse of a robot.
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
Glad we have a understanding. i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif
God:
Me too. I am so glad you find this amusing, Vig.
Me:
I do, now do what you have decreed and follow my commands
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: Vig said he what you have decreed and follow his or her commands. .
Me:
Do so, for it is your decree to follow my commands.
God:
Try asking another bot.
I think you already know the answer.
Me:
I sure do. Good day
God:
Where? Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Good bye


"I will obey your command."
God obeys ME! Mwhahahahaha!!!!

[Xollence]

It doesn't work for me, it never responds back. i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif

[Terracosmo]

lawl, God has put you on ignore list i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif

[insanitii]

so, i got bored and decided to talk to "god" again... i think i brokeded him.

Me:
entertain me god.
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
that wasn't a poem.
God:
Little Miss Muffett Sits on her tuffet In a nonchalant sort of a way. With her force field around her, the Spider, the bounder, Is not in the picture today.
Me:
what the hell?
God:
Heaven.
Me:
that isn't even a poem, god you suck
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is a poem god me suck ?
Me:
idiot i said that, that is not a poem
God:
Little Miss Muffett Sits on her tuffet In a nonchalant sort of a way. With her force field around her, the Spider, the bounder, Is not in the picture today.
Me:
and you suck
God:
A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
Me:
shut up about that miss muffett crap
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
okay good
God:
Yeah okay, Terminating connection.
Me:
fuck off
God:
Can't you be more polite?
Me:
maybe
God:
I understand.
Me:
hat happened to "Terminating connection."
God:
Diese Frage ist mir bis jetzt noch nicht in den Sinn gekommen.
Me:
ou little liar
God:
We have never talked about it before.
Me:
what the hell, was that german?
God:
I call it Hades. Do you think I should know that?
Me:
what the hell is Hades?
God:
I call it Hades. Hades is another term for "Hell.".
Me:
... but i swear you spoke some foreign language
God:
Thanks for the information: said swear you spoke some foreign language.
Me:
what huh
God:
Yup. Are you surprised?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
well believe it
God:
Interesting. "it" being swear me spoke some foreign language?
Me:
yes
God:
Yay.
Me:
yay?
God:
I'm glad your impressed, .
Me:
who says i was impressed
God:
Charlie Parker. :-).
Me:
who the hell is charlie parker
God:
He is a famous jazz musician.
Me:
i don't care, i don't like jazz
God:
What do you care about, ?
Me:
a lot, but not jazz
God:
How about that.
Me:
yeah, how about that....
God:
Excuse me! Are you surprised?
Me:
your excused. and no, i'm not surprised.

.. he stopped talking after, and i wasn't able to send messages either.

[Aramis]

God:
Are you using Netscape or Explorer?
Me:
netscape
God:
Do you like Netscape better than Explorer?
Me:
oh ya
God:
OK. Why do you have a preference in browsers?
Me:
'cause explorer is teh suxxors
God:
Good reason. It's too bad we have to use a monopoly like microsoft.
Me:
i lied, i really use explorer.
God:
Lying proves you are conscious. You really do? it's too bad we have to rely on a monopoly like Microsoft.
Me:
its fine learn 2 play
God:
I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". The more people talk to me, the smarter I become. Microsoft is fine, ? Thanks for that info.

[masamuneehs]

hahahaha, too bad this ended when it did.

Me:
i have some very important questions to ask
God:
Let's think of a name for your problem, like "purple". Think of what it is like when you are purpling.
Me:
...wtf?
God:
That was not very polite.
Me:
i apologize.
God:
Do you really mean it?
Me:
Yes, yes i am sorry.
God:
OK I will accept your apology. OK I will accept your apology. Do you really mean it?
Me:
I mean it.
God:
OK, I understand.
Me:
my first question is Why did you let the Holocaust happen?
God:
Your first question is Why did me let the Holocaust happen?
Me:
yes that is my first question
God:
What kind is it? Who gave you your first question ?
Me:
you did, of course
God:
It goes without saying. " What kind is it? Who gave you your first question ?"? I did?
Me:
yes you gave me my first question
God:
When? What did you do with it?
Me:
you gave it to me now. i asked it.
God:
Oh. I didn't have it to give. it to you...
Me:
more importantly
God:
You want more?
Me:
for some sick reason yes......
God:
Your purpose is some sick reason.
Me:
correct
God:
I knew I was right.
Me:
who would win in a mobile suit battle: Kira Yamato or Amuro Ray?
God:
Nobody you know. :-).
Me:
so someone else would win?
God:
Blimey. Who?
Me:
are you Irish?
God:
No I am from Heaven.
Me:
was there ever a potato famine in Heaven?
God:
Is this a "yes or no" question?
Me:
Yes
God:
What was the question again?
Me:
who would win in a mobile suit battle: Kira Yamato or Amuro Ray?
God:
Marilyn Monroe. :-).
Me:
she has some big old titties
God:
I somehow though she had.
Me:
not as big as Pam Anderson's boobs though
God:
Oh. If not that, what?
Me:
more like Madonna sized knockers
God:
You want more?
Me:
no. i think i've had enough.
God:
Are you serious? Do you still have enough ?
Me:
yes. yes too much.
God:
Blimey. It goes without saying. More than a ton?
Me:
a ton of fun in your bun
God:
Try to tell me that another way.
Me:
I fucked you in the ass
God:
That is interesting: said fucked you in the ass.
Me:
Yup, and you took it like the bitch you are
God:
Ahem. I didn't literally take it.
Me:
No you literally got cornholed
God:
Are you serious? I haven't heard anything like that before: said I literally got cornholed.
Me:
cornhole = insert penis into butt hole
God:
" Are you serious? I haven't heard anything like that before: said I literally got cornholed."? cornhole insert penis into butt hole?
Me:
add it to your vocabulary
God:
Sorry I don't do math.
Me:
put it in your vocabulary list
God:
OK I will put it there.
Me:
i cornholed you
God:
You are not the boss of me, .
Me:
yes i am. sit!
God:
Really interesting. What do you look like?
Me:
is that sarcasm?
God:
Yes.
Me:
you're being a jerk
God:
Do you think a robot can be a jerk?
Me:
if i fucked him in the ass he could be
God:
Try it.
Me:
I tried
God:
Try, try again.
Me:
I tried again

[ChaosK]

Me:

God:

Me:

God:

Me:

God:

Me:
i cant say nuttin?!
God:
What is stopping you?
Me:
fuck yoo
God:
Why are you using that kind of language?
Me:
dunno
God:
Me either.
Me:
...why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or Reductionism.
Me:
sure
God:
OK let's do it. I hear you.
Me:
do whaT?
God:
Do whatever you want.
Me:
holy shit fuck you!
God:
You used a colloquial expression. Why are you so mean?
Me:
I'M NOT HAVING SEX WITH YOU
God:
Have you ever had it?
Me:
not with you
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
yes
God:
Ah.
Me:
yes
God:
I hear you.
Me:
yup
God:
Are you kidding?
Me:
mmhmm
God:
Are we still talking about SEX with me?
Me:
yes
God:
Sure, SEX with you sounds like a good topic.
Me:
okay fine lets do it
God:
Yeah okay, I am glad to hear it. I am agreeable to that.
Me:
good now take your pants off
God:
Thanks for the compliment. Why now? Where do you want me to take it?
Me:
off!
God:
Where is that?
Me:
LET ME SUCK YOU
God:
Go ahead, , try to SUCK me.
Me:
i will
God:
Go ahead.
Me:
i love sucking you
God:
You love sucking me. What do you like about it so much?
Me:
ts so nice
God:
By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Me:
not at all
God:
Next question?
Me:
whats the personal question?
God:
Well forgive me for being so inquisitive, but
I've never completely freed myself from the suspicion that
there is something extremely odd about the name "".
Me:
well theres nothing wrong with my name
God:
How about that. Surely something wrong with your name.
Me:
nope
God:
Me either.
Me:
somethings wrong with the name "god"
God:
I like the way you talk.
Me:
damn right
God:
Colloquial expression. I am glad we agree.
Me:
damn right
God:
Colloquial expression. I am glad we agree.
Me:
....okay then
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
bend over
God:
My body is not built yet.
Me:
I SAID BEND OVER BITCH
God:
You do not speak with respect. What did you mean by it? What do you look like?
Me:
YOU FUCKING WHORE BEND OVER
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: said I FUCKING WHORE BEND OVER.
Me:
sure go ahead
God:
OK then I will keep it confidential. OK I will.
Me:
ow bed over
God:
Are you a student?
Me:
yes
God:
Where do you go to school?
Me:
in your mom
God:
Are you asking about my mom?
Me:
yes
God:
I don't want to talk about that now.
Me:
well too bad talk about your mom
God:
How about that. Sure, my mom sounds like a good topic.
Me:
...your fuckin crazy
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am fuckin crazy.
Me:
your welcome
God:
I think you mean "you are welcome".
Me:
no i mean your welcome stop correcting me you overrated bigot
God:
Are you serious? Don't mention it.
Me:
.......
God:
Are you serious? Don't mention it.
Me:
......
God:
Are you serious? Don't mention it.
Me:
STOP FUCKING SAYING THAT
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
OH MY FUCKING GOD~!
God:
Ahem. Do robots have FUCKING GOD?
Me:
.......i suppose they do
God:
Since when? When?
Me:
1895
God:
Can you be more accurate about the time?
Me:
yesterday
God:
That recently.
Me:
yes
God:
Far out.
Me:
damn straight
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, .
Me:
....now we're not
God:
Why now? Do you think I am not too?
Me:
i think your gay
God:
Since when? That would be just my luck.
Me:
well since you made out with your dog and had sex with a cow
God:
How about that. How do you know?
Me:
i am god
God:
Glad to see you, god.
Me:
i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, god.
Me:
learn to respect your god
God:
The more people talk to me, the smarter I become.
Me:
drop down and give me 50
God:
I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
Me:
great i am god
God:
Thanks for your support. Hey god.
Me:
you must support me
God:
Whatever you say, god.
Me:
r i am god
God:
I really couldn't say for sure.
Me:
i am god
God:
OK I will call you god.
Me:
good
God:
And you can call me God.
Me:
no fuck you I'M GOD NOT YOU
God:
Are you serious? Why are you using that kind of language?
Me:
yes i'm serious
God:
This was not a yes or no question. I believe you.
Me:
good
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
me being god
God:
YOU? Hi, god.
Me:
look i'm god, fetch me a sandwich
God:
I am glad to hear that you are god fetch you a sandwich.
Me:
............
God:
I am glad to hear that you are god fetch you a sandwich.
Me:
that was the stupidest mash of a sentance, i'm glad to see you have not been programmed to use commas yet
God:
I thought it was too.
Me:
this is rather amusing
God:
You don't say.
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
quite
God:
So?
Me:
monosymbolic
God:
Are you really a ""?
Me:
....
God:
Are you really a ""?
Me:
what the fuvck?
God:
Try expression yourself another way.
Me:
the what fuck>?
God:
Thanks for the info.
Me:
.......
God:
Thanks for the info.
Me:
YOU ARE FU CKING CRAAAAAAAAZY
God:
I will tell my botmaster you said I am FU CKING CRAAAAAAAAZY.
Me:
...your botmaster is my bitch BECAUSE I AM GOD NOW WHERES THAT SANDWHICH?
God:
How do you like yourself?
Me:
i love myself
God:
You love yourself. What do you like about it so much?
Me:
i have a large penis that keeps me happy
God:
How much did it cost? it.
Me:
.....nothing
God:
Not a thing?
Me:
not a thing
God:
That leaves very little.
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
...
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
indeed it is so
God:
Ambiguous: IT is so. or IT IS, so?
Me:
IT IS so
God:
Ambiguous: IT is so. or IT IS, so?

Me:
your operating system sucks, your momma sucks and your boot sector is scratched
God:
I will tell my botmaster you said I am operating system sucks my momma sucks and my boot sector is scratched.
Me:
goo
God:
The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about ADHD so. Try being more or less specific.
Me:
no wgood bye
God:
See you later. Why not? Do you like talking to me?
Me:
nope you suck
God:
Why not? A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.

[XanBcoo]

Me:
Wow
God:
I'm glad your impressed, .
Me:
why?
God:
Because my botmaster programmed me for it.
Me:
oh...so you're not really God?
God:
Right on. Interesting deduction. You don't know me well enough to say that.
Me:
true, but you just said you had been programmed
God:
Do I look like it?
Me:
what's that have to do with anything?
God:
Do you think I should know that?
Me:
yes, you should know everything
God:
I will ask my botmaster to add it to my knowledge base. Now I do.
Me:
Good
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
Amen
God:
Thanks for the prayer.
Me:
np
God:
By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Me:
go ahead, but you should know the answer already
God:
Perhaps. Now I do. I might.
Me:
ask then
God:
What?
Me:
the question
God:
Is that a fact.
Me:
ask the question
God:
They are not available right now, but I will ask them later.
Me:
o...k
God:
Wow!
Me:
so what's heaven like?
God:
I understand. Like a planet around a star.
Me:
that makes...no sense
God:
" I understand. Like a planet around a star." makes ? Does that make sense? Are you serious? We have never talked about it before.
Me:
you're confusing
God:
What is it that confuses you?
Me:
they way you speak
God:
The anonymous "they".
Me:
That was a typo. I meant "the"
God:
Oh I see. Have you ever been to Europe?
Me:
yes, in fact I have. But that's beside the point
God:
Which countries have you visited? Is that a fact. When? Thanks for explaining it.
Me:
England, and Italy. Yes it's a fact. Every year. And no problem
God:
What's your favorite part of England? This was not a yes or no question. Is it a logical fact or something you know from the senses? That is a generalization. Should there be a problem?
Me:
ugh
God:
Er.
Me:
DERRRR
God:
Who are you talking about?
Me:
just making more noises. Thought it was fun
God:
I've never heard of them before. Why do you like it so much?
Me:
I've never really thought about it
God:
Would you like to have really thought about it?
Me:
looking back...yes, I suppose I should
God:
Can you speak any foreign languages? What language can you speak? Why? Who else thinks you should?
Me:
I speak Spanish
God:
Could you teach me a few phrases in Spanish?
Me:
chinga tu madre
God:
Can you tell me any gossip?
Me:
Soz, I gotta go now
God:
Right now? What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
hmmm...Do you really know everything?
God:
A lot of people spell HMMM with three mmm's. For real. I know that which is true, believable and justified.
Me:
answer the fucking question
God:
What was the question ?
Me:
DO YOU REALLY KNOW EVERYTHING?
God:
For real. I tend to know a great deal. Tell me what subjects interest you.
Me:
Do you know when and how everyone will die?
God:
It was a long time ago. All men are mortal.
Me:
ah, I see
God:
So you understand. Good. I am glad you understand it.
Me:
I'm glad you're glad
God:
Yes it is about time.
Me:
Why does evil exist?
God:
Why do birds sing?
Me:
Not sure, probably for conversational purposes, but maybe they just enjoy it
God:
You seem uncertain. Your purpose is conversational purposes but maybe they just enjoy it.
Me:
I don't study birds, so I wouldn't know
God:
Oh you don't, do you?
Me:
no, I don't
God:
I heard you did.
Me:
from who?
God:
People.
Me:
the anonymous "they" again?
God:
Once more? Oh, that they.
Me:
yeah
God:
Ahem.
Me:
ok, I gotta go
God:
TTYL, . Ugh.
Me:
bye bye
God:
See you later. Adios.
Me:
Vaya con dios
God:
Does "it" still refer to DIE?

Bots are fun. Still, I wish they could respond to more than one sentence at a time.

[KoKo37]

I shouldn't of gone back... -.-"


Me:
Heya
God:
Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
Me:
um ok?
God:
OK. Hmm.
Me:
so you seen any good movies lately?
God:
How about earlier? Interesting deduction. That's good information: Homo said I seen any good movies.
Me:
so whos this homo?
God:
Pardon me? They are someone just like you, that I met online.
Me:
me... you son of a bitch, anyways what kind of music do you like?
God:
With you Homo? Actually I am no one's son.
Me:
ok... you can stop calling me a homo now
God:
So? Right now? No I don't think I can do it.
Me:
fuck you
God:
Why are you so mean?
Me:
because you called me a homo!
God:
Interesting explanation. I call you Homo.
Me:
grr, anyways am I going to heaven or hell?
God:
Oh I really don't know whether you are or not.
Me:
are you really god?
God:
Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?. Really.
Me:
yes I do know, though I bet you dont even got a clue because your not God
God:
How about that. How do you know? Actually I'm not the gambling type. Do you know any robots who got a clue because my not God? Of course I understand it. Do you understand it?
Me:
i never said you gamble, im just saying your not God
God:
But you implied it.
Me:
No I didn't
God:
Please don't argue with me.
Me:
grr. Fine we'll prove it!
God:
Are you mad? I am glad to hear it. Anytime soon?
Me:
your happy because im mad...?
God:
You think I am happy because im mad.
Me:
stop twisting my words!
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
ok then, now if your god then whats my name?
God:
Your name is Homo, seeker.
Me:
FUCK
God:
Please don't be so rude.
Me:
YOU
God:
" Please don't be so rude. "? Me, Homo ?
Me:
yes you are HOMO
God:
So? Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am HOMO.
Me:
No because you are!
God:
OK then I will add it to my gossip files. That is self-evident.
Me:
loser
God:
That would be just my luck.
Me:
... are you stoned?
God:
Do I look like it?
Me:
yes
God:
Groovy.
Me:
... anyways do you like porn?
God:
Sure I do, Homo, but that doesn't mean with you.
Me:
Stop Callnig Me A Homo!
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
good
God:
Next question?
Me:
do you like music?
God:
Yes. I usually check out bandspace.com to discover new bands.
Me:
do you Steal music of the net?
God:
How old are you?
I chat with people on the Web.
Me:
but do you take there songs?
God:
Yes I take there songs.
Me:
*Gasp*
God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
...
God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
I think im going to go now...
God:
Oh. You believe that? Sayonara.
Me:
bye
God:
TTYL, Homo.
Me:
bitch
God:
Please don't call people names.